Moving Beyond
by Agnes Robinson
Summary: AU of Lady Edith's life 1915 to 1918. Life doesn't run smooth. Follows the life, loves and trials of being Edith. Second story in the Knowing Her Own Mind universe. Sybil, Branson, the Downton cast and a few new characters are on hand to make Edith's life interesting.
1. Driving Lessons

Driving Lessons

Lady Edith Crawley stood at the front door of Downton Abbey in the spring of 1915 impatiently tapping her toe waiting for the chauffeur for her very first driving lesson. The reason she wanted to learn to drive wasn't because young men were being called up for the war and the family could soon be without a driver. That was the story she had given her father and he had fallen for it. The real reason Edith wanted to learn to drive was to have a way to escape watching her older sister Mary flirt with every eligible man who crossed the threshold. Edith had always played second fiddle to Mary. At Edith's ball during her first coming out season their dislike of each other had become evident. Mary had made it a sport to pull away every man who showed even the slightest interest in Edith. She had retaliated by indulging in gossip and attempting to ruin Mary's chances with first one man and then the next.

The worst had come when a grown Patrick Crawley had arrived for a visit at Downton. Edith and Patrick had always been close as children. For Edith that closeness had grown into love. Of course her parents and Granny had offered up Patrick as another plaything for Mary and Mary had snatched him to ensure her future place in society. Edith was sure Mary would have discarded him in a minute if a better offer had come along. Edith had been waiting for that day but it was not to be as Patrick had died on the Titanic and Edith's hopes had died with him.

Edith had waited to take her revenge. Mary's affair with Pamuk had seemed like a perfect opportunity. That had gone terribly wrong as Mary had destroyed any hopes Edith had with Anthony Strallen. That had been last fall, before her youngest sister, Sybil left for a yearlong nursing course in London. Without Sybil's good-natured temperament, family dinners had become a chore and were even worse when Mary maneuvered to have every male eye on the room trained on her. The hurt Edith was feeling along with her natural awkwardness was making the situation impossible and she wanted… Well she didn't know exactly what she wanted but she did know she had enough of Mary and her constant flirting.

The chauffeur pulled up to the door not in the Renault that Edith had been expecting but in the town car. He stopped the engine and got out.

"Milady," he said in an Irish accent and rough voice that Edith had always found mildly irritating. "I was directed to give you driving lessons starting this morning."

"Where is the Renault?" Edith demanded. "Why have you brought this car?"

"This car is more suited for lessons," he said. He kept his tone neutral and his head down, as he opened the driver's door for her to enter the car.

Once Edith was seated inside she was surprised when he gave her instructions on how to adjust the seat and test for the distance to the pedals. He then told her to get out and go around the front.

"But aren't you going to start the car?" Edith asked. "I just want to know how to drive it."

"If you get stopped and don't know how to start the car, you'll be stranded," he said in an even tone.

First he demonstrated the technique, shut the car off and had Edith attempt it. After five tries she still hadn't managed to start the car and was getting more frustrated by the second. Her normally styled hair was coming loose from her hat and swinging in her face and her hat was threatening to fall off at any second. She could feel the tears of frustration starting to well in her eyes. She looked up at the chauffeur ready to reprimand him if her was laughing at her, but that wasn't the case. He had encouraged her to keep trying and pointed out that few people could get the technique on the first try. Finally on the eighth attempt Edith heard the engine turn over and quickly pulled her hand back to protect her thumb as he had mentioned. Unfortunately, she pulled her hand back too quickly and the crank shot off and flew directly into the chauffeur's shin.

"I didn't mean that to happen," she said in way of apology.

"No, problem, Milady," he said through gritted teeth. His face was turning red and there was a white line around his mouth. "I think that's enough for today. Would you like another lesson same time tomorrow?"

The next day Edith had managed to get the car started after two tries, but had only managed to get it lurch forward a few feet. The lessons continued almost daily for the next month. No matter how badly she did, the chauffeur encouraged her to keep trying. Edith noticed more than once the man clinging to the passenger door or the dashboard as though his life deepened on it. She was still having problems keeping the car to the correct side of the road, but she could shift gears and stop and go when she wanted. Finally, her father gave permission for her to drive into town.

Her first foray into town she had almost hit a stonewall and missed the space where she was supposed to park. Instead she had almost a foot of the sidewalk under the car and the wheels perched precariously on the curb. Other cars drove past, honking with the drivers laughing and pointing at her. She wanted to knock her head on the steering wheel and scream in frustration. Branson, the family chauffeur assured her it wasn't bad for a first attempt and that she just needed to try again. After three failed attempts Edith was finally able to get the car parked reasonably well along the street and they were headed back to the main house, with yet another lesson scheduled for the next day.

While she was driving along the road, Edith contemplated the relationship her family had with their staff. Each of them had their favorites among the staff, each of them except her. Mary had Carson, Anna and William the junior footman wrapped around her finger. Mama had O'Brien although why anyone would be attached the sour old spinster Edith couldn't fathom and her father had his valet. Sybil was fond of the man sitting next to her. The two of them had gotten into a couple of political scrapes that had incurred the wrath of her father. Their behavior at the garden party had been shocking with his standing there smiling at Sybil and whispering in her sister's ear. Edith had felt a twinge of jealousy, not for the man, but for Sybil's ease and pleasure in the company of someone who so obviously admired her. Edith had thought Sir Anthony had admired her. He paid some attention to her and it had been pleasant, but his attentions had turned away from her and now she was alone yet again.

They had reached the front of the house when Edith realized she was going to overshoot the driveway and pulled the brake while forgetting to push in the clutch. The car gave a great lurch as the engine momentarily roared and then promptly stalled.

"Not bad for today, Milady," Branson said. The faint sheen of perspiration on his brow bellied his calm words. "We'll try town again tomorrow."

"I think I'm ready to try on my own," Edith said confidently.

"Not quite yet, I'm afraid," he said.

"I shall have to speak to my father about this," she said as way of a slight threat.

"Your father has left your driving status up to me," Branson replied. "I'm afraid you aren't quite ready to solo yet."

"Very well then, tomorrow," she said in a dismissive tone before leaving the car on the lawn where it had landed and heading back up the driveway to the house.

After almost two and a half months of lessons, Branson had finally declared Edith ready for the road and she had set out on her own. Her first trip had been to a friend's house not too far away to catch up on the latest gossip among their circle of friends and then on to do some errands for her father. She would take any excuse to stay away from the house that afternoon as Mary was having guests to tea and the last thing Edith wanted to do was to sit and watch her sister hold court.

"We're having three officers over tomorrow for dinner. They're all fliers. It's terribly exciting," Lady Marybeth told her. "They're all single, do come and help me entertain them Lady Edith."

"Yes, certainly," Edith said. She smiled as she sipped her tea. Finally, she had an opportunity to do some socializing without her sister in attendance.

"Do you think your sister, Lady Mary might come as well? It would even out the numbers."

"I will mention it to her," Edith said, suddenly downcast. Was she never to escape the cloud of Mary?

As it turned out Mary was already engaged much to Edith's relief. On hearing about the small soiree her father, Robert Crawley insisted Edith be driven by Branson rather than drive herself.

"The road will be dark," he said. "I don't want you taking any unnecessary chances."

"More like no chance to snog a flier in the car," Edith though to herself, but kept her mouth shut.

The party went off without a hitch. The men were all Canadians and somewhat more brash than Edith was used to, but she still enjoyed herself. She even managed to flirt with one of them and received a few compliments. By the time she was headed back home she had arranged to meet him the next week for dinner at a local pub. Her parents would have a fit if they found out she was going to a pub, but she didn't care. It was a date. Finally, a man was paying attention to her and she was going to enjoy every second of it.

The car pulled up in front of the house and Branson came around to hand her out of the car. As she stepped down she was busy thinking about Captain William Bellamy. Her foot caught in the hem of her dress and she fell out of the car. She would have fallen face first on the gravel if Branson hadn't caught her.

"Careful there, Milady," he said as he set her back on her feet.

"Thank you, Branson," she murmured before she headed in the house. She silently gave thanks for Branson's patience in teaching her to drive and saving her from the fall. Things were starting to look up.


	2. The First Date

The First Date

Exactly one week later Edith was contemplating her good luck. Her mother, father and Mary had decided to spend a few days in London. Sybil was at school in London and her father had decided to open the house for the summer. Edith had made up an excuse about London being too hot at this time of year and saying there was a party she wished to attend in the local area. She had three full days to herself and she planned to make the most of every minute. Her first order of business was to choose an outfit to wear on her date.

"What do you wear to a pub?" she questioned out loud to her empty room. She went to her wardrobe and began going through her cloths. Everything she pulled out was regarded and then discarded as being too formal, too severe, too tweed, just too everything. Finally she lit upon her dress from last fall's garden party. It was pretty and soft although Mary had made fun of her choice of hat. Edith thought for a second before she went to Sybil's room and helped herself to the assortment of hats her sister wasn't using for the summer. Men found her younger sister attractive so she might as well choose something from amongst her things.

When she finally had something she thought might do, she returned to her room and began experimenting with her hair. O'Brien and Anna had gone to London with her family so her choice had to be something she could manage on her own. She finally decided on soft unrestrained curls that framed her face and gave her a carefree appearance. She hoped William Bellamy would like the result and thought about her meeting with him at Lady Marybeth's party.

William Bellamy was of average height with brown hair and eyes. He had a pleasant smile and was not as restrained as the young men of Edith's acquaintance that belied his colonial roots. He was polite, but relaxed when he spoke to her. His soft accent and voice had attracted her right away and she found herself smiling at his jokes although she didn't fully understand all of them. He had told her his family was in the business of growing and selling apples in somewhere called Oshawa in Central Canada. He had signed up to do his bit and now flew a Sopwith Camel for the Royal Flying Corps. Edith had thought he cut a terribly romantic figure in his uniform with the wings pinned over his left pocket. There was no way she was introducing him to her family, especially Mary until she had herself established in his affections if anything were to develop beyond their first date.

It was late July. The days were long and it was still daylight when Edith arrived at the pub in Malton to meet her date. He was standing outside waiting for her when she pulled up in the car and came over to open the door for her once she had the car switched off.

"I'm glad you could make it," he said.

"I'm happy to be here," Edith said as she gave him her hand. She was careful not to catch her foot in her frock. The last thing she needed was to make an ungainly appearance and land in a pile at his feet.

They went into the pub and found a table in a secluded corner. Edith felt terribly wicked and a little apprehensive at her first time in a pub but managed to hide it well. Once they had ordered, a pint of ale had been set before each of them.

"What's the matter?" William asked her. "Haven't you ever drunk ale before?"

"No, not exactly," Edith said with a faint blush. "I've never been to a pub before."

"It will be a night of firsts for both of us then," he said. "You've never been to a pub and I've never been out with an English girl. By the way, call me Bill. Everyone at home does."

"Bill then," Edith said before she took a sip of her drink.

Their conversation flowed well over the meal. Edith knew a good deal about farming that she had picked up from her time spent with Sir Anthony and Bill had been interested in her descriptions of the various activities on her family's estate that she described. Before she thought Edith had invited him to join her for a tour of the estate and picnic on the following day. Edith had offered to drive up and pick him up, but he had said not to bother, as he would fly down as long as there was a grassed area big enough for him to land. She had told him about the size of the house and given him a brief description of landmarks in the area.

The next morning at ten o'clock Edith was outside dressed in a pair of pants tucked into her riding boots and looking skyward for the first sign of Bill. She had requested a picnic lunch and already had it packed in the back of the town car along with four bottles of cider and a large blanket. She heard the plane before she saw it as he flew over the house circled and came to land on the lawn in front. Edith waved happily and headed towards the plane. As she looked back towards the house, she saw the curtains move slightly as the remaining staff peeked out to see what had made the noise. There were heads looking over the fence from the stables and all of the staff were lined up staring from the back of the house. There would be no keeping this from her parents. She had never seen a biplane up close before either and it was all a new experience for her.

Bill jumped down from the wing when he saw her approach and leaned over to give her a quick peck on the cheek. Edith blushed and smiled at him. Without the constant competition from Mary she felt herself relax and enjoy the experience of spending time with someone away from the pressures of her normal family life.

"You said it was the largest house around. You weren't kidding," he said. "It sticks out for miles from the air."

"It's been in the family for generations," Edith said. "We're all set for the day. I have the car loaded and ready."

Bill had taken off his helmet, scarf and flying jacket and changed to a different jacket. He took her hand as they walked across the lawn to the waiting car.

"Am I not to meet your father and the Lord of all of this?" he asked.

"I'm afraid not today," she said coyly. "He's in London on business. It will be just us. If you can ever be alone with all the eyes watching you around here."

"I did notice a few looks when I flew over," he said with a laugh.

"Be careful, this is an estate, even the walls have eyes," she quipped back.

Edith had shown him around half the estate before they stopped for lunch in a secluded meadow on the opposite side of the lake from the house. It was nice spot that was sometimes used for pasture. The house and Greek columns could be seen in the distance and set what Edith hoped was a romantic scene. Bill lay back on the blanket and looked up at the trees. Birds where chirping and the gentle sounds of water lapping against the shore were all they could hear.

"It's hard to believe there is a war on," he said. "It's all so peaceful here. It seems so far removed."

Edith just took a long drink from her bottle of cider. She was dying to kiss him but had no idea how to go about it. She had never been kissed and was nervous in anticipation.

"Most of the men from the estate have signed up," she finally said. "My younger sister is training as a nurse."

"And you? What do you want to do?" he asked turning his gaze on her and reaching over to twist a strand of her hair around one finger.

Edith shrugged. She could feel him touching her hair and her skin was crawling in anticipation.

"I've been thinking about getting more involved in the running of the estate. I want to be involved in the harvest this fall."

Bill's had slowly moved his hand to the back of her neck and was guiding her down towards him.

"Lovely," he whispered. "You'll do well. Do you think you might like to kiss an apple farmer?"

Edith was just inches from him. She could see the curve of his mouth and the fleck of darker brown in his eyes.

"Yes, please," she whispered back, before she closed the gap between them. He tasted nice like the cider they had been drinking. Her head was swimming whether from the cider or from his kiss she wasn't sure. His arms were around her pulling her into a half lying position on top of him. She knew it was dangerous to be here with him like this but at the moment she didn't care. Here was what she had been waiting for, someone who liked her, seemed to find her attractive and showed an interest in what she had to say.

She pulled back slightly and smiled before he pulled her in again for a second kiss. This time his tongue slid between her lips and caressed the inside of her mouth. His lips were like velvet and Edith felt herself drowning in the sensations he was causing inside her. When they finally broke the kiss, he looked at her through half closed eyes.

"Will you be my girl?" he asked.

Edith laid her head on his chest and slid her arms around him as best she could. She nodded.

"I don't get leave very often. Will you mind?" he asked.

"I don't mind," Edith said. She suddenly felt very shy and uncertain about what to do with a man who just asked you to be their girlfriend. "Would you mind terribly if I don't introduce you to my family right away."

Bill suddenly pushed her away from him and sat up.

"What's the matter? I'm not good enough?" he asked.

"No, it's not that," Edith gasped and began wringing her hands. "They are just so… difficult." She finally said.

He reached over and took her hand.

"You're going to have to decide," he said. "You can't have it both ways."

Edith nodded and looked down.

"I'll introduce you to them the next time your available," she said. "Just be warned it might not be pleasant."

She stood up and wrapped her arms around her waist and took a few steps towards the lake. She felt him walk up behind her, put a hand on her shoulder and turn her to face him.

"How bad can they be?" he questioned. "They have you for a daughter."

"That's nice of you to say," she said as she tentatively reached out to slide her arms around his waist. She was cringing a bit waiting for his reaction. Bill's only answer was to pull her closer for another kiss.

Before he left for the day, he took the wings off his uniform jacket and gave them to her.

"For my girl," he said.

"Yes, I am," Edith said with a massive smile. She stood back as he taxied the plane and took off into the wind. She remained on the lawn watching him, until he was out of sight.

When her parents returned from London, Edith went to talk to her mother.

"Mama, I would like to invite someone over to dinner."

"Is this someone special you've met?" Lady Cora inquired gently. The staff had been a buzz with the event of a biplane landing at Downton and she had heard all about it the moment she set foot inside the house. "Who perhaps dropped by when we weren't here?"

Edith nodded and fiddled with her gloves.

"He's a captain in the Royal Flying Corps. He's ever so nice. At least I think so," she said nervously. "He's a Canadian."

"We'll invite him over and see how things go," her mother said. "I'll send a note inviting him today. When is he available?"

"On Thursday next," Edith said. She made her escape as quickly as she could. She was so nervous she felt sick. What if her father didn't like him? He certainly had been complaining about the odd tracks left in the lawn. What about Mary? She didn't think she could stand loosing him to her sister. The next eight days were going to difficult in the extreme.


	3. Would You?

Would You?

Tom Branson pulled the Renault up to the gate of the airdrome just outside of Bridlington to inquire after the men he had been sent to pick up. The sentry at the gate directed him down the line of tents to the Officer's Club at the far end. Once he had located the club and stopped the motor, he took the opportunity to survey the airdrome. The Officer's Club looked more like a shack that had been patched together from a collection of rough boards. Canvas tents were lined up in three neat rows along the area he had just driven through. The sound of the engines could be heard as a constant drone with planes landing and taking off. Not far from the Officer's Club was a collection of green biplanes with an air sock dancing in the breeze above them. In the distance was the skeleton of a large building with a curved roof that was under construction. Other than the biplanes it looked to be what Tom assumed every other military station looked like, a collection of tents with men going about their business. He had heard the planes were dangerous. Up close they looked even flimsier than they did from a distance. It was a bit exciting and at the same time daunting to think of going into the sky in one of the wood and fabric machines.

Just then three men emerged from the Officer's Club and approached the car.

"Were you sent from Downton Abbey," one of them inquired.

"Yes sir, I'm here to collect a Captain William Bellamy and two of his comrades."

The three men looked at each other at the sound of his accent. They didn't say anything until they got into the car.

"Can you tell us where to get some Irish whiskey around here?" asked one of them. He had a French Canadian accent. "We hear its almost as good as the stuff back home."

"There is a pub on the way, that may have some," Tom said in a non-committal tone. Irish Whiskey was contraband and he could be in a lot of trouble if anyone found out he had helped them to procure some. "Bloody hell," he thought to himself. All he needed was to deliver these three to the door of Downton hammered out of their minds on drink. During the drive the men didn't address him again until they had made their stop at the bar. They returned with a full case of whiskey and in good spirits. They had been inside long enough Tom suspected they had stopped for a pint or two as well as the case of alcohol.

"Can you put this somewhere for safe keeping until tomorrow?" Captain Bellamy asked him. "The lads back at the field are going to love this stuff."

"Certainly, Sir."

"We hear there are two more daughter's, other than Bill's girlfriend," the third man who hadn't said anything up to now commented. "What can you tell us about them? Are they pretty?"

"They are my employers daughters, Sir. I really can't comment."

"Oh, Come on. Are they pretty or not and better yet are they spoken for? We're not going to tell."

Tom sighed. These three were on the make for more than just a little female companionship. He couldn't blame them. It was rumored that fliers had shorter life expectancies than regular soldiers and after seeing the planes they flew it was no wonder.

"They're all pretty," he said at last. "The youngest is home from a training course in London for a few days, but I believe she's spoken for." He didn't add, "By me and if you touch her I'll push your teeth down your throat," even though he would have liked to.

"That leaves you two to fight it out over the eldest," the one they called Bill said.

"Good luck with that," Tom thought but wisely remained silent.

When they finally arrived at Downton the household was lined up in two reception lines. Sybil was home for two days from London and smiled at Tom when she thought no one else was looking. Captain Bellamy was busy being introduced to her father and the other two fliers were so busy staring at the house and the line up of servants they didn't see much else. Of course the servants had been all a twitter with the prospect of three fliers being at the house overnight and were busy watching them and trying not to be caught staring.

"We've arranged to take you all riding this afternoon," Edith said to Bill. "I hope you all ride?"

"Don't be daft, Edith," Mary cut in. "They're all colonials of course they ride."

They were headed into the house. Edith could feel Bill stiffen slightly at her side.

"That is not necessarily true, Lady Mary," Bill said. Edith slipped her hand to his for a quick squeeze.

"Oh, the tales of cowboys and Indians are false?" Mary said with raised eyebrows and a look straight down her nose at him.

"I personally have never met an indigenous Indian," he said. "Charles there is from Alberta so he is the closest you'll find to a cowboy, but he's a lawyer in his other life not a farmer."

"And what do you do in your other life?" Mary asked him condescendingly.

"I live on a large production farm and my family owns a cannery. I'm not a cowboy," he said with a level gaze. "When I'm not flying kites that is." He turned and looked at Edith with a smile.

Mary rolled her eyes slightly and headed for the stairs. The one called Charles could hold his own with Lady Mary and he moved to speak with her. The other one, who had been introduced as Renee, was busy chatting with Lady Cora and Lady Sybil.

The men were shown to their rooms and soon rejoined the others to head to the stables. Mary and Sybil were both accomplished riders who liked to ride fast and attempt every jump. They were soon far ahead with the other two fliers, leaving Edith and Bill to catch up to them later.

"I warned you, my family could be a bit much," Edith said.

"We're adults. We can take care of ourselves," Bill said with a small smile. "I'm just glad you like farmers."

He reached over as he maneuvered his horse close to Edith and kissed her.

"I've been waiting for that all week," he said. "Do you think the others will miss us?"

"Mary is too busy playing hostess and Sybil won't care," she said. "Let's stop up here."

They stopped by a small meadow that was shielded from the lane by a heavy line of trees. They dismounted and tethered their horses in the meadow. As soon as they were well out of sight of the lane, Bill pulled Edith into his embrace and kissed her thoroughly. Edith couldn't help but giggle.

"What's so funny?" he asked with a furrowed brow.

"Six months ago if you had asked me, I thought I would never kiss anyone. Now, I'm here with you. It seems surreal."

"Do you think your parents like me?" he asked between kisses.

"They'll like anyone who wants to take me off their hands," Edith said turning her eyes down.

"Edith," he said pulling back slightly. "Don't be so hard on yourself."

"Why not?"

"I like you," he said suddenly sober. "You're the only girl I've met since I've been over here that knows the first thing about farming."

"That's hardly complimentary," Edith said.

"I meant it as a compliment. We have things to talk about. What would I talk to your elder sister about? I would find her boring. You're anything but boring."

Edith smiled and looked at him coyly in an attempt to flirt.

"There are those who would disagree. I was lucky when I met you," she said after a minute.

"That you are," he said as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back into his embrace.

Edith was thoroughly enjoying herself and slid her fingers inside the buttons of his shirt. It wasn't long before his jacket was on the grass and she was laying on it. His shirt was open and she was running her fingers through his chest hair. She was nervous when he ran his hand up her side and cupped her breast, but soon relaxed into the sensation. He opened the front of her blouse and kissed her milky white skin and ran his lips along the top of her chest just above her corset. Edith could have stayed all afternoon and evening experimenting with his touch, but soon she got up and started buttoning her blouse.

"What's wrong?" he asked leaning back on one elbow and making no move to do up his shirt.

"Mary will be suspicious if we stay out any longer," she said. "She'd just love to tell Papa we were off on our own."

Bill nodded. "We can't have that now can we? I would just have to marry you on the spot."

Edith froze in her ministrations to her attire.

"Don't even joke about something like that."

"Why not?" he said. "Would you?"

Edith sat back down with a thump. Her mouth was open slightly in shock.

"I barely know you."

"There's a war on. There isn't time. You haven't answered me."

"Yes, yes I would," she said with a smile. She leaned back towards him and placed her lips on his. Her hand brushed over his bare chest.

"When do you want me to talk to your father?"

"Later, not now. Its nice to have this just between us for a bit."

"If you want," he said. "We better go back or the lads will think I've been captured by enemy spies."

The dinner and evening continued into the small hours of the morning. Renee could play the piano and kept them entertained with round after round of the latest songs. Edith was having a lovely time dancing with Bill. She could feel Mary glaring at her but didn't care. Bill seemed to have no inclination to pay the slightest attention to Mary and Edith was basking in his attentiveness. Once everyone retired for the evening Edith sat in her room, reliving the events of the afternoon and evening. She wanted to go down the hall to the bachelor's wing and find Bill, but thought better of it. She would not give Mary the satisfaction of catching her out. She would bide her time and make plans to get together with him somewhere where they wouldn't be discovered.

The next morning Sybil and their father had taken the early train to London by the time Edith was up. The men were assembled in the dining room for breakfast and Bill asked her to take a walk with him once she had finished eating. They walked the grounds together until they came to a secluded spot in one of the gardens. They came together so quickly Edith bumped her head against his and knocked her hat crooked. His hands were everywhere and Edith wasn't much better as she ruffled her fingers through his hair and squashed herself against him. Soon enough Edith could hear the unmistakable sound of Branson pulling the Renault up to the door to take the men back to the base.

"I don't want to let you go," she said playing with the buttons of his uniform jacket.

"I'll be back soon enough," he said.

"Not soon enough for me."

"You think you can come up and see me?"

Edith nodded and snuggled closer.

"I'll write," he said, before they headed to the waiting automobile.

* * *

"Well?" Lady Cora asked Edith once she had gotten her alone. "How did things go?"

Edith looked at her hands and blushed.

"He asked me Mama. He'll talk to Papa when he sees him next."

"Edith are you sure? He seems like a nice young man, but you barely know him."

"I know him enough to say yes, Mama. After all there is a war on, how much time do any of us have really?"

"I don't know what your father will say."

"Hopefully he will want to see me happy," Edith said.

"Of course he does, Dear."

Mary came into speak to her mother and stopped when she saw Edith there.

"What are you discussing?" Mary asked.

"Captain Bellamy has asked your sister to marry him," Lady Cora informed Mary.

"I don't know what you see in him," Mary said to Edith. "I found him rather dull."

"Funny," Edith couldn't resist a jibe back. "He said rather the same thing about you." Edith gave Mary a self-satisfied smirk just before she got up and left the room.


	4. Driving Back

Driving Back

They had just cleared the grounds of Downton when the three men broke out a bottle of Irish whiskey and started passing it around.

"Driver," said the one with the French accent. The name on his uniform read Cyr. "What's your name anyway?"

"Branson, Sir."

"Branson, you know anywhere where we can get some pussy?" he said with a French accent.

"Not ugly pussy either," the one they called Charles said with a loud laugh. "What about you Bill? Did you get any? Did she use her spurs when we were riding?"

"Piss Off," Bill shot back with a scowl. "And don't talk about my girl like that."

"What's the matter? Didn't she show you her fur pie?" Renee Cyr asked joining in the taunting.

"She's my fiancée. One more word and I'll hit you so hard you won't wake up until next week."

"OK! OK!" Renee said. He had already downed a third of a bottle of whiskey and was getting boisterous. "Just get that driver to take us somewhere with hot women. That oldest sister was a BITCH."

"Branson, you know anywhere?" Bill asked.

"Yes, Sir," Branson replied. It wasn't the first such request he had from guests he had drove back and forth since he had been at Downton. They generally were a little more reserved in their requests but at least from what he had overheard none of them had made a play for Sybil. Sybil had been occupied all weekend with her family. They hadn't had one minute to themselves even when she left as her father had taken the train with her. Other than a quick squeeze of the hand when he helped her out of the car, he would have to wait until her next term break in October.

"Are they pretty?" Charles demanded. "I don't want to go anywhere you have to put a bag over their head!"

"I wouldn't know, Sir."

"Your not one of them are you?" Renee demanded. He was getting more intoxicated by the minute. "One of those boys who doesn't like girls?"

"I have a sweetheart, Sir."

"Boring like him ever since he met that toff girl," Charles said cocking his thumb at Bill.

"You better hurry up and get them there," Bill said.

Tom tromped on the gas a little harder to urge the Renault up to top speed. After twenty minutes he pulled up in front of a house with an attractive rose garden in front.

"They call this place the rose garden," Tom said. "You should be able to find what you want in there."

The two men jumped out of the car and headed to the door.

"You've got two hours," Bill called after them. He turned back to Branson. "Let's go for a drink. There has to be a pub around here somewhere."

Tom drove to the nearest pub and killed the motor. Bill hopped out of the car and waited for him.

"Aren't you coming in?"

"I shouldn't, Sir. It isn't my place."

"Oh screw that, I'm not some limey prick that's going to blab to your employer. I actually work for my living. I hate to drink alone."

Tom got down from the car, left his hat and gloves on the seat and accompanied Bill inside. They chose a table near the window so Tom could keep an eye on the car. Bill went and got two pints at the bar and took a long drink before he dropped himself into his chair.

"So how long have you been going out with the youngest one?"

Tom blanched at the man's words. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You look like a sick calf every time she walks by. She isn't much better. You said she was spoken for and yet there was no beau in evidence. It's obvious."

"What do you want?" Tom said eyeing him suspiciously.

"Nothing, just a little information. I asked Edith to marry me. She's accepted. I thought I would get to know her younger sister's boyfriend. That's all."

"No one knows. We haven't told a soul. We're planning on getting married in November," Tom finally confessed.

"So what's our future father-in-law like? I have to talk to him next time I see him. Edith just said he's difficult."

"Proud, a product of his class but decent. You shouldn't have any problems. Myself on the other hand will be an entirely different matter."

"You should think about living in Canada," Bill said. "Nobody there really gives a damn about all the titles and the rest of it. Not many women to speak of though. There are at least twenty men to every single woman. Why aren't you a soldier? Not many left around here who aren't."

"I'm not English for one thing and I have no desire to be part of the British army. I'll wait for conscription."

"Fair enough. That older one really is a bitch."

Tom just chuckled at his statement. "How did you learn to fly?" he asked finally.

"I had a kite back home. Got one soon as they came out for checking on crops. My family owns a lot of land. It's easier and faster to check on it from the air. Can't say I'm too fond of the Sopwith Camel though. It's harder to fly. My old kite was more fun."

Tom found himself relaxing a bit in Bill's presence. The men talked about cars and the latest innovations in machinery before it was time to pick up the other two fliers.

"I won't tell Edith about you and her sister," Bill said. "I take it she doesn't know?"

"I'd appreciate that."

* * *

It was six o'clock in the evening by the time Tom had the men dropped off and was back at Downton.

"Where have you been?" Mr. Carson demanded as soon as Tom came into the servants' hall.

"The men requested a detour, Mr. Carson. It took longer than expected."

"What was the nature of the detour?"

"I'd rather not say." Tom colored profusely when the maids in the servants' hall turned their eyes on him while everyone waited for his answer.

"Whatever it was, you can say it in front of the staff," Mr. Carson said.

Tom wondered how the man could be so thick. Was he old enough that he forgot what it was like to be in his twenties.

"I took them to see some English roses. They are men after all," he finally said. Everyone in the servant's hall started to giggle. One of the younger men at the far end of the table was choking on his tea.

"Yes, well, humpf," Mr. Carson said finally understanding. Even Mrs. Hughes had her napkin pressed to her forehead and was using it to wipe the tears of laughter from her eyes. Daisy was standing in the doorway with a puzzled look on her face.

"What's so funny about going to see some flowers?" Daisy questioned.

The room erupted into a loud chorus of laughter with Daisy still standing by the door wearing a puzzled expression. Tom turned around and headed out the door. He would make do with whatever he had in the cupboards at his cottage. If anyone wanted him they could bloody well come and find him for the rest of the evening. He'd had enough.

* * *

The first week in September Edith's beau made a solo trip to Downton to speak to Edith's father. He flew in, circled the house, landed and proceeded to taxi the plane up to the front of the house. Edith ran out to meet him and threw her arms around his neck as soon as he jumped down.

"I have so much to tell you," she said with excitement. "I've been out with the estate manager every day and I even drove the tractor. I've got all sorts of ideas already."

"Do you now? I've got a few ideas of my own," he said as he held her close. "They don't concern farming though."

He laughed when Edith blushed.

"How long can you stay?" Edith asked.

"Two days."

They headed in the house and ran into Lord Grantham who had been headed to the front door to see the airplane parked on his front lawn.

"I'll just go arrange a room for Bill while you two have a chat," she hinted.

Her beau gave her a rueful grin as she headed off to find Mrs. Hughes. Lord Grantham invited him into the library and offered Bill a drink. Bill was looking somewhat nervous. He declined the offer of a drink and was shifting form foot to foot uncomfortably. He was still wearing his flying gear and finally snatched his helmet off his head. He smoothed down his hair and finally managed to speak.

"Lord Grantham, I wanted to ask your permission. Well, that is I want to say. Well."

"Out with it man."

"I want to marry Lady Edith. I'm from a good family. She'll be well provided for. I would like your blessing."

Lord Grantham set his glass on a side table and went to look out the window. He thought for a moment before he turned back.

"I've heard about the reputation of fliers. I expect you to be faithful to my daughter and not running around behind her back. If you mistreat her in anyway, I will seek you out and make you regret the day you were born."

"I intend to treat her properly, Sir. I won't dishonor her. She's very important to me."

"You do realize you'll need your Commanding Officer's permission. There is no certainty in war and for God's sake be careful flying that contraption."

"I know that only too well," Bill replied with a very serious expression on his face.

"I'll give my permission on one condition."

"What's that, Sir?"

"You stop chewing up my lawn with that machine. It's going to take my Gardner weeks to fix the mess you've made."

"That can be arranged," he said as he stepped forward to shake Lord Grantham's hand.

Edith came back accompanied by her mother. Lord Grantham congratulated them both again and rang for some champagne. Mary was in London as was Sybil so it was only the four of them at the house for the next two days. Edith had arranged for Bill to stay in the Red Bedroom. It was the furthest of the guest rooms from her parent's room and would afford them some privacy if she decided to make a late night visit. She knew she was supposed to remain chaste and pure for her wedding night, but all she could think about when she looked at her fiancée was exploring more of what lay under his uniform. Her thoughts made her blush. When he looked at her when the champagne was delivered she suspected his thoughts were running along the same lines.

"We'll have to have your grandmother for dinner tonight," Lady Cora said. "She'll want to be first in on the news."

"Oh Mama, must we?" Edith complained. She turned to Bill. "Granny can be a might fractious at times."

"I think I can weather the storm," he said with a grin.

"More like a monsoon when it comes to my mother," Lord Grantham muttered.

* * *

"So this is Edith's colonial," said the Dowager Countess when she arrived for dinner that evening. "He certainly is younger and better looking than Anthony Strallen."

"Oh Granny," Edith groaned.

"Is that contraption on the lawn yours young man?"

"I arrived in it, if that is what you mean. Technically it's property of the Royal Flying Corps."

"Robert, the mess on your lawn will never do. Your father would never have stood for such a thing. You had best see to it immediately before you have guests that matter."

Edith and Bill lagged behind as the others made their way to the dining room. He was laughing so hard Edith had to cover his mouth with her hand.

"Shhhh, they'll hear you," Edith admonished. She was trying not to laugh herself.

"Just who is Anthony Strallen?" he inquired with a grin.

"I'll tell you later," she said. "In private."

"Promise? I like the sound of in private later," he whispered in her ear.

"What are you two whispering about?" her grandmother demanded with a sly smile. "Edith were you out on the farm again without your hat? Your face is much too red. You're going to ruin your complexion with all your gadding about in motor cars."

"When were you thinking of getting married?" Lady Cora tactfully changed the subject.

"Around December," Bill said. "I should be back from France sometime around then. I'm afraid I can't be more precise."

"So soon," said the Dowager Countess.

"There is a war on Granny," Edith said. "Why should we delay?"

"It just isn't done, Edith. Think of our friends that have to be invited."

"No Granny, most of their son's are in the war too. They will understand. We don't want to wait."

"What's next?" the Dowager Countess demanded. "Is one of your sister's going to walk through the door and inform us that she is already married? You girls are entirely too modern for me."

Edith looked at her plate hesitating in her response.

Edith's fiancé took her hand. "Modern suits me just fine. I would marry Edith tonight if I could."

The Dowager Countess opened her mouth to say something and closed it again. This was one fly she wasn't going to let out of the trap. If this young man wanted Edith that much then best get her married before he could change his mind.


	5. The Red Bedroom

The Red Room

That night Edith went to the bottom drawer in her wardrobe and pulled out a box she had put there after her last shopping trip into Ripon. She opened it to reveal a nightgown made of silk in the latest style. It clung to her curves like a sheath. The straps were small and the v-neckline plunged between her breasts. She looked at herself in the mirror and her hands flew to her cheeks. She was embarrassed by what she was contemplating yet at the same time the desire to go to her fiancé was driving her crazy. Other than his slightly off color comments about wanting to spend time alone with her, he hadn't come right out and asked her to come to his room. He hadn't even said he loved her. Was desire enough to base a marriage on? Edith wasn't sure but it certainly was better than her prospects with Anthony Strallen. He had been a nice man, but as far as physical attraction, he had left her wanting.

Finally, she got up, put on her housecoat and slippers and got the candle from her beside table. She put the key to her bedroom door in her pocket after she locked it and headed down the hall. When she reached the door to the Red Bedroom she paused and took a deep breath. Once she turned that handle her decision would be irrevocable. Was she ready for this? She still wasn't sure, but whatever happened she didn't want to be an old maid that had never been with a man. It was now or never.

She cautiously glanced up and down the hallway before she tapped quietly on the door. She turned the knob and entered the room. Her fiancé was sitting still half dressed in an armchair he had pulled over so he could look out of the window.

"I was wondering if you'd be along," he said as he held out his hand to her. Edith set the candle on a dresser before she blew it out and went over to hold his hand.

"So who is Anthony Strallen?" he asked.

"A man who was interested in me for a time last fall. He changed his mind."

"Did you love him?"

"No. I was lonely and he paid me compliments. I was fond of him."

"Do you love me Edith?" he asked. He looked up at her. She couldn't fathom the expression on his face, the room was too dark and she couldn't make out any of the details around his eyes. She was so terribly nervous all she could do was nod.

"Good. I've written to my parents. They'll be overjoyed I've found someone nice. They were afraid I would marry a French Canadian."

"Is that so bad?" Edith questioned.

"I'm of English/Scottish decent. The English and French don't mix well. There aren't a lot of English speaking girls back home. You'll find there are lots of English brides. You won't be lonely if we get there."

"What do you mean if?"

"The news coming from France isn't good. There a strong chance I might not…"

Edith stopped his words with her fingers on his lips. She kneeled down and pressed her lips to his. His arms went around her and he kissed her back harder than he had ever done in the past. He was kissing her with so much passion Edith was slightly frightened at first. He stood up pulling her with him, pushed her housecoat off her shoulders and trailed kisses down the side of her neck. He was holding her pressed against his naked chest where his shirt was hanging open. Edith could feel herself responding and her natural awkwardness starting to leave her.

"I didn't lock the door," she managed to mumble. "I wasn't sure if you would want me here."

"Why wouldn't I?" he said against her lips. He went to the door and locked it all the while keeping an arm around her so she went with him. Edith kicked off her slippers. They hit the dresser with a slight thunk.

"I'm not pretty like my sisters, I don't really know why you would want me, but I'm glad that you do." she said.

"I don't like dark haired women," he said. "Your beautiful when you forget about your family and talk about the land. Don't let anyone tell you your not."

He kissed her again cradling her head against his shoulder. Edith slid her arms around him and pressed herself close. The passion of a few minutes ago was back even stronger than before. His tongue was in her mouth and she was sliding his shirt down his arms and onto the floor. Her hands trailed along the muscles in his arms and touched his back in wonder. His lips trailed along her cheekbones and caressed the sides of her eyes. He moved back from her slightly as he pushed the thin strips of silk from her shoulders and the nightdress landed in a puddle on the floor. He wrapped his arms around her again and lifted her slightly to carry her to the bed.

The roughness of his wool uniform pants scratched her legs. Edith allowed her self to be lowered to the bed and reached for the closure of his trousers as she sat on the side of the mattress. She undid the buttons. They were tight and she had to tug hard to get them undone. He let his trousers drop as she tentatively stroked his hardened penis through his drawers. He began undoing the buttons and allowed his underwear to drop as well. Edith's eyes opened wide as his hardened penis sprang free of its restraint. He kicked off the remaining cloths and moved to join her on the bed. She was more than a little frightened and turned her face away from him and shut her eyes tightly.

"Look at me," he said placing a hand on the side of her face and turning it back towards him. "Edith," his lips trailed over hers while her eyes were still squeezed tightly shut. "Open your eyes and look at me." Slowly she opened her eyes keeping her gaze riveted squarely on the center of his chest.

"It's alright," he coaxed trailing kisses across her lips. "We're not doing anything terrible. Try to relax." He pushed the folded back covers open a little further so she could get into bed and then lay down beside her. "Don't be frightened." He took her hand in his and kissed her wrist and forearm. He stroked her abdomen and thighs until she sighed and started to relax. Her eyelids drifted shut as she began to enjoy his touch and her hands began to tentatively explore his body. He kissed her mouth again allowing her desire to build to match his own. It wasn't long and Edith was kissing him with increasing passion as she pressed herself against him tighter. He followed the trail of his hands over her body with his lips. He slowly kissed his way around the undersides of her breasts making her moan with the sensation. Finally when she was pulling on his hair and her nails were scratching his back he traced a line with his tongue around her aroused nipple and pulled it into his mouth. Edith began to whimper. He finally broke off what he was doing and moved to look directly into her eyes.

"Do you like that?" he questioned with a grin.

"Yes," she said through trembling lips. Her eyes were open and she returned his smile shyly.

"Good, I like how you sound when you like something."

He placed his lips on hers again and kissed her with more passion. She was twisting in his grasp and pulling on his shoulders. She had no idea what she was doing but it felt right. He attempted to push her legs apart with his hand, but she resisted.

"Edith you have to move your legs, trust me. It's not going to hurt. You'll like it."

She finally let the muscles in her legs go enough that he was able to nestle his hips between her thighs. He continued to kiss, suck and tease her body until she was squirming beneath him again and moaning in the back of her throat. Suddenly she felt a pressure inside her with a tearing sensation. She tried to pull away from it, but he held her tightly to him.

"Relax, give it a minute," he whispered to her. She nodded her head before his lips closed over hers again. Once her body adjusted to him being inside her the sensations took over and she threw back her head as he moved. He took his time making every movement count to the fullest. Edith didn't feel awkward at all or out of place. She felt as though she was floating above the bed on a cloud of sensation. Suddenly the awareness increased to a fever pitch and she felt wave after wave pushing against her. She started to struggle against it.

"Let it happen," he coaxed her. "It won't harm you." He reached between them and rubbed her pubic area. He circled her swollen nub with his index finger until she cried out. He had been holding himself in check and sweating with the effort. He finally let his own climax happen and emptied himself into her warmth.

They lay in the same position, not moving for a long time. He looked down at her and continued to stroke her hair away from her face as though he was trying to memorize every line of her face and second of their time together. Finally he moved onto the vacant side of the bed. When Edith tried to get up, he pulled her back against him.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I have to go back to my room," she said. "Someone might notice I'm gone."

"Do people normally look for you at three in the morning?"

"No," she said.

"Stay with me."

"But!"

"No, buts. Stay. We can do that again in a few minutes if you like."

"So soon?" she questioned. "I didn't think you could that quick."

"I'm not an old man. Who told you about sex?"

"No one."

"What? Didn't anyone tell you the basics? What to expect? Nothing?"

"Not a word."

"What did you think? Did you like it?"

"It was nice. Like an unexpected present but better," she said against his shoulder.

He lay staring at the ceiling for a bit, lost in his thoughts.

"Fliers have a bad reputation for living a wild life. I will stay true to you. I give you my word. You have nothing to worry about."

"I don't want to think about the war or your flying or any of it," she said. "I just want to be here now with you."

"Sounds good to me," he said as he kissed her and the passion rekindled itself for the second time.


	6. Letters from France

Letters from France

The two days of her fiancé's visit were over too soon for Edith. They had spent every second possible together. They had gone out to look at the progress of the harvest and discussed everything from technical details of machinery and recent advancements to the relative merits of various forms of marketing. This was more than Edith had experienced with Sir Anthony. Not only where she and Bill well suited mentally, their physical connection was strong and she savored every touch and kiss as though she were saving them up until she could see him again.

The second night of his visit he made love to her almost desperately, like a drowning man clinging to life. Afterwards when he thought she was asleep, she could feel the silent sobs wracking his body. She wrapped her arm around him and pulled him tight against her but never opened her eyes or made a sound. Whatever demons he was fighting and what was up coming with his position as a flier, he couldn't tell her. She could only offer the comfort of her body and hope for the best.

Edith accompanied him outside when he was ready to leave the following morning. She had been relaxed and happier than she had ever been in her entire life and she hated to see him leave.

"I'll miss you," she said.

"I haven't gotten you a ring yet. This will have to do," he said. He pulled off his class ring he had on his pinky and pushed it on the center finger of her left hand. It was too big to fit on any of her other slender fingers. He held both her hands in his. "I know I haven't told you before. I love you, Edith," he said before he pulled her towards him and kissed her.

"I love you too," she said blushing madly when Branson came around the corner to turn the propeller as instructed when Bill would need to start the engine.

"I'll write as often as I can," he said before he moved to the cockpit of the plane and signaled Branson to turn the propeller. Once the engine was revving, Bill taxied the plane onto the lawn and took off. He did a slow circle around the house before he headed off towards the coast. Edith stood watching him till he was out of sight. She glanced over to see Branson still standing near the house watching the plane fade into the distance as well.

"Did you need anything else, Milady?" he inquired.

"No, you can go," she said in dismissal. Edith walked back into the house and headed up to her room to change into trousers. She wanted to go out and check on some things with produce that was being sent to market. Strange she thought to herself. I haven't tripped on the stairs even once in the last two days. Maybe some of Bill's dexterity is rubbing off on me.

Letters began arriving within the next few days addressed to Lady Edith from Captain William Bellamy. She blushed and fluttered over every one and didn't let Mary's catty remarks diminish her joy in any way. Bill wrote to tell her he had heard back from his parents and expected his mother to write to Edith soon. His other letters mostly contained declarations of his feelings for her and inquiries and comments on the details of her activities on the home farm she had written about. He couldn't discuss anything about the war or his part in it. Suddenly, the letters stopped arriving for a few days and began coming in batches of two or three at a time. All were signed Somewhere in France and each mentioned how much he looked forward to the day they would be married. His CO had given permission for their wedding. The only thing missing was word on his leave.

To Edith's relief her monthly had shown up six days after Bill had left and she had written to tell him she was definitely not with child and not to worry about a thing. She would be waiting for him when he returned. She heard from his mother in early October and had written back saying how much she looked forward to being able to meet his family. Everyone was noticing the change in Edith's disposition. She had stopped baiting Mary and was letting more and more of Mary's disparaging comments go. Edith was still somewhat uncomfortable in social situations especially when her elder sister was present, but at the same time was more supportive of other people around her and was becoming more and more involved in the running of the estate.

"Love suits Edith," her grandmother had commented one day when she was visiting with Lady Cora. "She looks almost attractive on any given day."

"She does seem terribly happy with him," Lady Cora commented. "I just wish this dreadful war was over and they were settled."

In late October, Branson had earned three days off. Edith offered to do the errands for the estate in his absence and run her grandmother around. She stopped by the village post office and picked up a large bundle of mail for Downton. When Edith got back to the house she took the mail to Carson's office for sorting. She hadn't had any letters for the last six days and was anxious to see if there was anything for her. Once the mail was sorted, she was happy to discover there were three letters from Bill and one addressed to her from a Major Bertrand. A small packet with the return address of Captain Charles Sinclair who had visited last summer was also included in the stack. She was puzzled by the package but tucked it in her pile of mail to open once she was alone.

She took her letters and headed out to the Greek columns away from the house. It was one of her favorite spots to open her letters where she wouldn't be disturbed. She opened all of Bill's letters first and read them in chronological order. She smiled at the references he made to her last letters and his complaints about the weather and rations they were receiving at the aerodrome in France. She opened the letter from Major Bertrand only to have her smile slowly fade and the tears stream unchecked down her face. Her vision was so blurred she couldn't read the words on the page. She sat stone still until the late afternoon light started to fade. Edith collected her letters and headed towards the house. She felt as though her body was made of stone as she climbed the stairs towards her room. When she got to her wardrobe she opened it, took out her black dress, gloves and shoes and put them on. She took the fancy clips out of her hair and placed them into a box on her dressing table.

She opened her writing desk and placed Bill's last three letters into the bundle of previous letters. The winged pin he had given her when they first started going out joined the letters and she fingered the ring still in place on her finger. Slowly as if in a fog, she rose and took Major Bertrand's letter and the packet from Captain Sinclair downstairs to find her father.

"Edith, why are you dressed like that?" her father began. "What's happened?"

She walked to him and held out the letters before she silently turned to sit on the red sofa in the library. She stared straight ahead not seeing her mother or Mary enter the room.

"Robert what on earth?" her mother questioned.

He motioned for Lady Cora and Lady Mary to sit with Edith.

"Captain William Bellamy was killed on the 23 of October 1915 while landing his plane at an aerodrome in France," he read.

Both women gasped. Lady Cora reached to cover Edith's hand with hers until Edith withdrew her hand from her mother's and folded her hands in her lap.

"There was a quick change in temperature that caused ice to form on the ground. His plane skidded on landing and hit a barbed wire fence. It caused the plane to flip. He was killed instantly," Robert explained. "There is a second letter here from Captain Charles Sinclair who visited with Bill last summer. He is returning Edith's letters they found in his possessions along with the picture he was carrying of Edith."

"How terrible," Lady Cora said. "Edith you should lay down. You've had a terrible shock." Lady Cora stood and tried to encourage Edith to get to her feet.

Finally Mary went to her sister's side and said, "Come along Edith, you need to rest." Something in Mary's voice finally galvanized Edith into motion. She stood and headed up the stairs to her room, with the two women beside her. Edith remained in a dreamlike state for the next two days. Dr. Clarkson was called and he assured them the shock would wear off as Edith accepted her loss. Mary, Cora and Anna took turns checking on Edith throughout the day. Although she ate a bit and drank some tea or water when offered she remained silent. On the morning of the third day Edith had disappeared from her bedroom. A search of the house was undertaken. They found her an hour later on the bed in the Red Bedroom fast asleep with tearstains on her cheeks. She slept through well into the afternoon. When she awoke, she got up, went for a bath and got dressed. She went down to join her family for tea.

"I'm glad to see you're up and about, Edith," her father said. "Are you feeling any better?"

"Much thank you," she said. "When is Sybil expected home? I'm looking forward to seeing her."

"Another three weeks."

"Is Branson back? The town car was acting up while he was away. I wanted to tell him about it."

"He got back day before last," Mary volunteered.

"I'll go and discuss it with him later," Edith said.

"How long are you planning to wear mourning?" Mary inquired.

"At least three months, possibly six," Edith replied. "I'm not sure. Bill wanted me to be happy. He wouldn't want me to be sad and grieving for too long. We weren't like that."

Mary wanted to point out that Edith had only known him for four months but bit her tongue. There were no barbed comments, no sliding glances or sneaky remarks coming out of Edith. She seemed calm and detached from the petty nuances that had made up her life until last summer. Greif had changed Edith and Mary felt herself mired in the quagmire of the mess she had made of her relationship with Matthew Crawley and the scandal of her affair with Kamal Pamuk. Perhaps it was better to do things as Edith had done. She had found someone who cared for her and accepted his proposal, even if it had only lasted a few months.


	7. Her Sister's Keeper

Her Sister's Keeper

"Lady Edith, you are needed immediately," Mr. Carson said as he came into the drawing room where Edith was seated writing letters. Edith stood and accompanied Carson to the front door where William was waiting with her hat and coat. Ten days had passed since Edith had received word of her fiancé's death and she was functioning somewhat better although still despondent.

"What's going on?" she asked.

"The chauffeur has collapsed while he was waiting for your father out front," Mr. Carson said. "We've gotten him into the car. You're needed to drive to the hospital in the village."

Edith went outside. Her father was waiting for her. William followed her outside and got into the back of the Renault with Branson who was out cold and propped up on the seat.

"Do you think you can managed the motor?" her father asked.

"As long as I don't shut it off, it should be fine," Edith said. The Renault was notoriously difficult to drive and even harder to start. Robert got in the back with William and Branson. Edith climbed into the driver's seat, let go the hand brake and started off down the drive. She managed to get the car up as far as third gear. They weren't moving at top speed, but they would still get there. Once they arrived at the hospital, William ran inside to find help. In a few minutes a nurse and an orderly came outside with a wheel chair to collect the chauffeur.

They had a hard time getting him out of the car, as he was dead weight. While Branson wasn't a particularly tall man, he was muscular which added weight to his slack form. Robert Crawley went inside to speak to Cousin Isobel. Edith stayed with the motor as she didn't dare turn the engine off. It was going to take everything she had learned about driving to get the Renault turned around and back to the garage at Downton. After a few minutes her father came back outside and stopped by the driver's seat to speak to her.

"Edith, do you know anything about Branson having a wife?"

"No, not a thing. Why?"

"When they removed his gloves he was wearing a wedding ring. I will speak to Carson about it when we return. He's got pneumonia. Apparently the reports from the front are full of cases. There is an outbreak in London as well. He must have contacted the disease when he was there."

"I didn't know it was contagious," Edith said with a worried expression. "Oh goodness, Papa. He's been driving you and Mama about. I hope you don't get it."

"Dr. Clarkson seemed to think everyone would be fine as long as we stay warm and don't allow ourselves to get a chill. I will speak to the staff as well about taking precautions."

William was waiting to hold the door for Lord Grantham. Once he was settled and William had taken the seat next to Edith up front, she pulled the car away and did a series of turns around the village to get them pointed back in the direction of the Abbey.

Over the next two weeks, Edith did a lot of the driving around the estate. Pratt, one of the groomsmen could drive, but wasn't very good at it and knew absolutely nothing about maintenance. Her days were taken up with running her grandmother and mother about and answering letters of condolences from friends. She had taken the ring off her finger and placed it in a box with the rest of her letters and items from her engagement in the bottom drawer of her wardrobe.

The afternoon Sybil was expected home, Edith drove to the station to fetch her. Edith was glad Sybil was coming home as she had always been like a breath of fresh air in the house and was the one family member who didn't treat Edith as though she were a nuisance to be tolerated. Sybil had been her usual outgoing self until she received the news of Branson's collapse and insisted she be taken to the hospital. Edith felt somewhat intimidated by her sister's take charge attitude with the stricken man and was further shocked when she learned that her sister was in fact the missing wife.

Edith's first reaction had been one of disbelief, but watching her sister's concern for her husband and anguish over his illness gave Edith a new sense of connection with her. Sybil was trusting her with her secret and turning to her for help in a way no other family member had done in the past. On the trip back to Downton with her barely conscious brother-in-law in the back seat with her sister, Edith resolved to help Sybil in any way she could. Sybil had taken a step that few in their world would ever attempt in marrying away from title or wealth. During the trip and the ensuing struggle to get Branson into the house, up the stairs and into a bedroom, Edith realized the depth of feeling her sister must have for the man to do something so drastic.

Later that evening once the house had settled, Edith went to check on Sybil.

"How is he doing?" Edith inquired.

"Not well," Sybil said. "He has a heart murmur. Normally, it wouldn't be an issue but he is so weak, it will take everything he has to fight the pneumonia. It's in both lungs."

"You need rest," Edith said.

"No. I have to stay with him," Sybil said. Edith could see the fatigue around her mouth and the stress in her body.

"Let me help you. Tell me what to do. I can take care of him for a few hours at least. You won't do him any good if you get ill. It's not like I can sleep anyway."

"Is the grief very bad?" Sybil asked suddenly realizing she had been so wrapped up in her husband's illness she hadn't acknowledged her sister's loss since she returned.

"Bad enough," Edith said. "I need something to do."

"Very well," Sybil agreed. "You're going to need an apron or you will ruin your cloths."

Sybil gave Edith instructions as to how to care for Tom. The most Edith could do was to prevent him from laying flat, keep the steam from hot water close to the bed and wipe down his face, neck and shoulders in an attempt to bring down the fever.

"If he tries to take off the bandages I've put around his abdomen don't let him. He needs to cough but the excessive coughing can tear muscle tissue and that will lead to more problems," Sybil said. "I've given him medication and the other treatments won't need to be done again until five in the morning. If his fever gets worse or anything happens, call me right away."

Edith nodded her understanding and agreed to have Sybil woken at four. As Edith sat on the side of the bed and methodically wiped her brother-in-law's face and neck with a cold cloth she thought how strange it was to be with him like this. He had always been just another facet in the running of the estate to her like the rest of the employees. She recognized how hard it must have been for him to be here performing his duties as chauffeur never acknowledging any type of family relationship while waiting for her sister's return. Edith didn't understand how the two of them could have found the strength to defy convention as they did, but it was done and she for one had accepted it.

It wasn't long and Branson went into a fit of coughing. She retrieved a rag from the pile on the bedside table and gave it to him. She felt a little queasy when she saw the amount of mucus he had coughed up, but disposed of the rag as Sybil had directed and washed her hands. Once she had changed the water in the basin, she came back and began wiping him down again. His chest and back were raw from the mustard plasters that had already been applied, and it made Edith cringe. His eye's opened slightly and he looked at her without moving.

"What are you doing here, Milady?" he wheezed. "Where am I?"

"You're in one of the bedrooms at the Abbey," Edith said. "Sybil and I brought you back this afternoon. She's resting for a bit."

"She's here? I thought it was a dream."

"You have to fight Branson. You've got to get better for Sybil."

His eyes fluttered shut before he lost consciousness again.

Over the next few days everything blurred together for Edith. She spelled Sybil off so she could go for short meals and periods of sleep. Edith never let on about Sybil's marriage even when their family made comments about how Sybil was making much too big a fuss over a servant.

"I would like to think she would make that big a fuss over anyone who was gravely ill under this roof," Edith said at dinner one night.

"You can't mean that," Mary said. "He's a married man as well. It isn't proper."

"I do mean it," Edith said. "I would want to be taken care of if I was ill, even if it was by a perfect stranger. Who's to say what is proper?"

"Edith!," her mother scolded, "You know very well it isn't proper to be alone with a married man in his bedroom. We are making allowances due to the severity of Branson's illness. Once he is able to care for himself this will have to end."

Seven days after Edith and Sybil had brought Branson back from the hospital, Edith had gone to check on Sybil. Branson had taken a turn for the worse. Every breath was labored and his skin was burning up. Sybil had a large bucket of ice and was desperately packing it around him as he lay on a sheet in an attempt to bring the fever down.

"Sybil, why is he worse?" Edith questioned. "He seemed a little better the last time I saw him."

"This sometimes happens," Sybil said. Edith could see the tears running down Sybil's cheeks as she worked. "If the ice doesn't work…! Oh, Edith!" Sybil turned and threw herself into her sister's arms. The stress of keeping Sybil's secret, her own grief and the prospect of someone else dying who was so healthy and full of life only a few short weeks ago were too much for Edith. The sobs broke from her lips and the tears streamed from her eyes as she held her sister. The grief poured out of her into the room until the tears wouldn't come anymore. When the two sisters finally stopped crying and wiped their red blurry eyes, they heard a slight rustle come from the bed.

"What's all the noise?" Tom Branson rasped out. "The bed feels wet." He sighed and fell asleep.

"The fever has broken," Sybil said, while wiping the tears from her cheeks. "He's going to live."

"And your going to have to tell father," Edith said to Sybil with a grin.

Both sisters started to laugh as they began scooping the ice off of Sybil's husband and finding some fresh sheets for the bed.


	8. Winter

Winter

Christmas 1915 was approaching and Edith's grief was starting to lessen. She still missed Bill terribly, but was able to think back to their time together with great fondness. Sybil had decided to take on some hours at the local hospital and Edith checked in on her brother-in-law most days to make sure he was getting his rest and wasn't over doing it. Sybil and Branson had told the family about their marriage and tensions from the announcement were running high in the house.

One afternoon Edith came in to find Tom sitting in the library after a confrontation with her father. When he had been working as the chauffeur he had always seemed so self-confident and cocky. She noticed a vulnerability about him since she had started to get to know him that she had previously never recognized. Edith thought back to the times he had shown her patience and kindness when everyone including herself would have given up on her. She had mentioned her disagreement with Mary and he had suggested she try apologizing. "He is a nice man, if the rest of them would just give him a chance," she had thought to herself.

That evening Edith joined Mary in her room while she was dressing for dinner. Anna had already left as Edith was still wearing black so didn't need her help.

"I'm surprised to see you here," Mary said. "I thought you would be helping the invalid."

"Tom's not an invalid, Mary. He's just weak. He will get well soon enough. Sybil is back from the hospital. She can see to him." Edith was nervous and a bit fidgety as she moved to sit on the footstool in Mary's room.

"I for one am certainly glad Papa hired a new chauffeur. It was dreadfully inconvenient without one."

"Yes, the new one seems competent," Edith looked at her hands. Her words came out in a rush. "Mary, I wanted to tell you I'm sorry for writing to the Turkish Ambassador. I wish I had never done it."

"Your apology won't mend the trouble you caused."

"I know that. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I don't want to fight anymore."

"I'll accept your apology for what its worth," Mary said turning back to the mirror.

"We should go down," Edith said rising to her feet and moving to the door.

"I'll be down in a minute."

Once Edith left the room Mary took a hanky out of her vanity and dabbed her eyes. Part of the mess she was in was Edith's fault for spreading gossip, but the majority of it was her own fault and there was little she could do about it. If she had accepted Matthew Crawley when he first asked her instead of worrying so much about status and position, she would now be married to the man she truly loved.

* * *

Christmas Day was a difficult one for Edith. She put on a brave face and took part in all of the holiday celebrations but part of her couldn't help thinking how she had expected to be a married woman by now. Sybil and her husband had seemed so happy together during the family gift opening that Edith couldn't help but envy them and wish that it were she and Bill sharing the day.

That afternoon Edith accompanied Cousin Isobel and Sybil to the local hospital. Surely there was something she could do for the patients. The hospital was full of the injured from the war. The sight of so many men with serious injuries pushed her out of self-pity and into action. Cousin Isobel directed her to first take a teacart around the ward and dispense tea or water as needed. Many of the men were lonely and asked her to come back and talk to them after she had finished her rounds. Isobel asked her to sit with three or four of the men who either couldn't read the letters they had received from home because their eyes were bandaged or couldn't write due to their injuries. Two of the men asked if she would come and visit again. Edith noticed how the men in the adjoining beds listened to the letters she was reading aloud as if they were looking for the tiniest thread of normal in a world that had been turned inside out. She resolved to start coming to the hospital at least two or three times a week to visit the injured and made arrangements with Cousin Isobel before she left for dinner and the evening's festivities at home.

The rest of the holidays passed pretty much the same as every other Christmas at Downton had over the years with one exception, Sybil's husband. Edith dreaded Mary's social maneuvering at her parent's parties. Mary's jibes and petty comments had slowed since Edith's apology but her desire to be the center of male attention at every gathering hadn't diminished one bit. At the first soiree Tom had attended at her grandmother's insistence he had made sure Edith was included in the socializing in the drawing room and deliberately started a conversation about farming with some of the men to allow her to shine. His naturally charming personality coupled with Granny's reinvented background had made him an instant sensation among the guests. Edith would miss her sister and brother-in-law when they moved to their own place in York although Edith suspected the others would be glad to have the constant reminder of Sybil's rebelliousness out of the house.

By mid February Edith was out of mourning attire and a regular visitor at the local hospital. There didn't seem much to do on the home farm in winter and she was rather bored. One of the men who had recently been brought in asked her if she could obtain a copy of an agricultural circular, as he wanted to catch up on the news before he returned to his family farm.

"I didn't know there were circulars dedicated to farming," Edith said. "I've been taking an interest in the home farm on my family estate but there doesn't seem much to do in winter."

"There is always more than enough to do on a farm," replied the Lieutenant. "I was looking into winter crops before I left for the war last year. The seed is the key and ordering it well in advance. There are all sorts of new theories. I studied agriculture at the University of Aberdeen."

"I didn't know there were courses at the universities," Edith said. "I find it all very interesting."

"There are a few schools offering agriculture and there are lots of books and circulars. I think there are even some courses offered by post."

"That is very interesting. Tell me what you know about marketing of produce? Last fall our farm produced more than we could use, yet the avenues to sell the goods seemed rather restricted."

Their conversation continued for another half hour with a few of the other men who were up on the topics they were discussing joining in. By the time they were finished Edith had a number of new ideas to look into and promised the Lieutenant that she would look for the circulars the next day when she was in Ripon. The men would have happily kept chatting longer, but she had ended their conversation when she noticed the Lieutenant starting to tire.

Edith stopped by the hospital on her way back to Downton the next day to share the assortment of agricultural circulars she had found in Ripon with the Lieutenant. She had been surprised at the variety of topics to do with agriculture that were available. He had been very happy to get a copy of the particular publication he was interested in and pointed out an article that he though she might find interesting.

On the way out Edith stopped to talk to Cousin Isobel.

"Your visits are making a world of difference for many of the patients. It's a shame there is no where for them to go for a convalescent stay," Isobel Crawley remarked. "As soon as they are well enough to walk they are sent home. So many would benefit from extended rest."

"Mama and Papa won't give permission for even a few of the rooms to be used," Edith said. "But they won't listen to me. You and Dr. Clarkson will have to convince them. If you could convince Mary it might go a long way. Sybil is only at the house once in a while for the odd visit. I doubt they will listen to her."

"Have you given any thought to what you might do with your time?"

"I'm still interested in the operation of the home farm," Edith said. "One of the officers told me he studied agriculture at university. I thought I might look up some books. I've got a number of circulars to read through. I have to find something to occupy my time."

"Well, you know my views. I think women should be allowed to pursue their own interests. I wish you luck with it."

Over the next few days Edith eagerly devoured every word of the circulars she had purchased. She went through the books on agriculture in her father's library but found most of them were out of date and didn't take into account any of the latest innovations in machinery or new methods of harvesting. She was frustrated with the lack of information available to her and decided to write to the university in Scotland. She also decided to talk to the estate manager and obtain a list of projects that were planned for the home farm until spring planting.

Three weeks later a course catalogue along with a letter outlining the application procedure arrived for her. Edith looked at the catalogue with trepidation. Her father still mentioned from time to time how much he regretted allowing Sybil to attend nursing school in London. He would never allow her to go to Scotland. The college listed an Associate Program that could be done through correspondence. Undertaking applied projects could award some of the credits. She found the course descriptions rather confusing and decided to show the catalogue to Sybil and Tom the next time she saw them as they had both attended college and would understand things better then she.

* * *

A few days later Lord Grantham had a late meeting in York and Edith asked if she might accompany him under the pretext of dropping off a hamper from Mrs. Patmore for her sister.

"Tom had said you called, Edith. He said you had something you wanted to share with us."

Sybil and Tom didn't have a telephone at their flat, so Edith had called him at work. In Edith's mind they didn't have much of anything but Sybil was always happy to see her, which made the flat more inviting in turn.

"I've received a course catalogue from a university in Scotland. They have an Associate Degree. I didn't understand it all so I wanted to ask your advice," Edith said while reaching into her handbag for the catalogue.

"Goodness, I would have no idea," Sybil said after looking at the section Edith indicated. Nursing has a predetermined curriculum so there is no choice of courses. Tom would have a better idea than me. He'll be home soon."

Sybil continued unpacking the hamper Mrs. Patmore had sent while Edith sat on a chair at the kitchen table.

"I don't think Papa would let me attend the actual university," Edith said. "That's why I was thinking of correspondence."

"No, I doubt he would either especially as I tricked them into sending my fiancée with me for the interview process. They'll expect you to come home with an _unsuitable_ match as well. I'm sorry I've ruined your chances, but I'm not sorry I went to college or that I tricked them."

"Sybil, what did you get up to on that trip?" Edith teased her.

Sybil's bright red face was its own answer.

"Can I ask you something?" Edith questioned. She started fiddling with the edges of her handbag.

"What is it?" Sybil had finished unpacking the hamper and started setting the table for tea.

"Where you frightened? I mean the first time."

Sybil stopped what she was doing and came to sit with Edith.

"I was mostly upset. I had said, "No" then things just sort of happened when I was least expecting it. I don't regret it though."

"I was frightened," Edith confessed. She still hadn't looked at Sybil. "It isn't right how they never told us anything."

"Bill?"

Edith nodded a tear trickled down her cheek.

"Don't regret it Edith. You loved him."

"I don't regret it. If I ever have children I don't want them raised that way. In a way I wish I had gotten pregnant."

"You'll find someone. They might not satisfy Papa or Granny, but I'm sure you will."

Just then they heard the key in the latch and Tom came in. Edith had dabbed away her tears and put on a brave smile before he entered.

"There you are, darling," Sybil greeted him. "Look at the lovely care package Edith has brought us."

"Hello, Lady Edith," he said. "It's nice to see you."

He walked over to give Sybil a quick kiss. It embarrassed Edith slightly that they were so open with their affections in front of other people, but at the same time she thought it must be nice to be self-assured enough to allow it.

"Hello, Tom," she replied.

"Edith's brought a course catalogue. Can you look at it for her? I can't make heads or tails of it," Sybil said.

"Yes, I'd be happy to after tea. What's for tea? I'm starving."

"Go clean up," Sybil pushed on his shoulder.

"His illness certainly hasn't affected his appetite," Sybil commented when Tom had left the room. A devilish smile was directed at her sister, "for anything!" she continued in a conspiratorial tone.

Edith blushed and began to giggle covering her mouth with her hand. She got up and helped Sybil place the food on the table.

Tom read through the catalogue after tea flipping back and forth from the full program to the Associate Program.

"The Associate Program isn't that much different than the first two years at the university," he finally said. "They have a working farm in Scotland. Time is divided between class work and time spent at the farm. For the Associate Program you have to send regular reports on a project you have chosen and that has been approved by the university plus complete written course work. After the two years you can decide if you want to transfer to the full time program for the next two years."

"I think I would like to do the Associate Program or at least try," said Edith. "I don't know if Papa will allow me to make decisions about the farm though."

"I don't know farming, but I do know politics," her brother-in-law said. "If you make a good financial argument he won't have much choice. The food shortages are going to get worse the longer this war lasts."

"You maybe right," Edith replied. "The home farm is there to supply the estate and it costs money to run. I was trying to get some of the extra produce to market last fall. I had some success but it was difficult."

"It always seemed silly to me, to leave the orchards to the deer after the household was supplied," said Tom. "I used to go down and pick a few baskets once the workers had left. The rest went to waste. I'm sure there are lots of projects you could find to do."

"Thank you for your help," Edith said. "I'll have to think this all over."

"Don't get discouraged," Sybil said. "I'm sure you can figure out something. You know the farm as well as father, perhaps even better."

There was a knock at the door. The chauffeur was there to collect Edith for the return trip. Edith rose to leave and thanked them both for their help again. She sent off her application to the university a few days later. Somehow she would find a way to convince her father, but first she had to be accepted.


	9. Convincing Father

Convincing Father

Lady Edith Crawley sat in the drawing room of Downton Abbey shortly before Easter 1916 waiting for her father to put in an appearance. She had been conditionally accepted to the Associate Program in Agriculture at Aberdeen University pending the acceptance of her term project. The planting would begin next month and Edith wanted to have her plans in place before then. Her palms were moist and she kept looking towards the clock.

"Edith, dear, you look nervous," her mother said.

"I'm just waiting for Papa to return for luncheon," Edith said.

After what seemed like hours but was really ten minutes. Lord Grantham walked in followed by the Dowager Countess. Edith closed her book and followed the others to the dining room. Her hands were shaking slightly and her mouth was dry. Part way through the luncheon, she set down her utensils and looked at her father.

"Papa, I've decided to take some correspondence courses on farming, agriculture really. I was wondering if you could order some new books for the library?" Edith said as a way of testing the waters.

"As long as you don't have any ideas about running off to college like your sister, you can take all the courses by post you like. Leave a list of books you want with me after luncheon and I'll see to it," he replied.

"Why all this interest in farming, Edith? It certainly isn't very ladylike," the Dowager Countess questioned.

"There is a war on Granny," Edith said. "There are food shortages. We have the land to produce more. We shouldn't waste so much of what we have. I want to learn more about it."

"Still, it isn't very becoming when you return to the house covered in dirt," her mother chimed in. "You must make more of an effort to not be so hands on, dear."

"Actually, I want to be more hands on," Edith said excitedly. "Part of the correspondence course is to take on projects and I have one in mind for livestock."

"Good heavens," her father said. "What's brought this on?"

"I've been thinking about it since last year when Bill was here," Edith said still excited. "We buy our meat when we could easily raise our own. I've got it all worked out on paper. Won't you let me show it to you Papa?"

Her family exchanged glances. It was the first time Edith had mentioned her deceased fiancé without starting to cry and she was showing excitement about something for the first time in months.

"Certainly, you can show it to me, Edith," Lord Grantham said with a small smile of encouragement.

"What are you planning to do for the summer, Mary?" Edith asked her. Edith's face was still glowing with excitement.

"Not farming, if that's what you had in mind," Mary said.

"No, I was just wondering. I wish you would consider coming to the hospital for an afternoon. The men appreciate the visits so much. I plan to continue going at least twice a week over the summer."

"Now don't tell me you're getting modern ideas and plan to go gadding about like your younger sister, Edith," her grandmother stated. "I don't know what you find to do at that hospital."

"Visiting the wounded and making plans for the home farm is hardly gadding about, Granny" Mary defended. "If she's happy poking about the estate, there can't be any harm in it. I'll consider coming to the hospital, Edith. I don't know how I could be of much help."

After luncheon Edith brought a folder with the details she had worked out to show her father. She had followed Tom's advice to create a financial argument for the changes she wanted to make and had gone through the estate books with the manager. As well she had been working on a list of future projects to make the home farm more cost effective and curb the wasted resources.

"I see what you're saying," Lord Grantham said. "There will be initial outlay with some of this. It will be sometime before you break even and even longer before you make a profit, but you will be cutting many of the expenses of running this estate. I must say, I'm impressed by the amount of work you've done on this already."

Edith was embarrassed by her father's praise, but gratefully accepted it.

"Thank you, Papa. Then do you agree? May I have free run with the livestock?"

"As long as you work with the estate manager and stick to the budget I will provide you for all of this. You may."

"Oh, how wonderful," Edith exclaimed with excitement. "I've already talked to the butcher in the village. He said he would take all the meat we could provide. As well he will do the slaughtering in exchange for part of each animal. This is going to work!"

"My only concern is the outline you've made to hire more farm help, we are already experiencing labor shortages. I don't want you pulling the existing help away from their regular duties. You will have to hire workers, but I don't know where you expect to find them."

"I'll have to think of something," Edith said. She gave her father a kiss on the cheek before she almost bounced out of the room.

By the end of July the Battle of the Somme was raging and the hospital was overflowing with casualties. Mary had agreed to go to the hospital one afternoon with Edith and had quickly joined forces with Cousin Isobel and Dr. Clarkson to put pressure on Lord and Lady Grantham to open Downton Abbey as a convalescent home. Edith's plans for her livestock expansion were well under way and she was enjoying every minute she spent in the outdoors. Lord and Lady Grantham arrived home one afternoon to find a cart stopped in the middle of the driveway and Edith busily directing a crew of workers. The men were placing what looked like gate sections on an area of the lawn.

"Edith, what in blazes is going on?" her father demanded.

"I've decided to pasture sheep on the lawn over the summer," she said. The excitement was evident in her voice and she was smiling.

Lady Cora had gotten out of the car and was surveying the area of the lawn in dismay.

"Now see here. Why wasn't I consulted?" her father demanded.

"But you were, Papa, I mentioned it the other day," Edith's smile was slowly fading. "You said if I could find a solution to not having the man power to maintain the lawns I should do it. This is it."

The wind was knocked out of Robert's anger as he realized she was right.

"Very well, Edith. What do you have in mind?" he asked.

"The men are erecting temporary fencing," she said. "We will have a small flock of young sheep on the lawn. The fence will be moved every few days. The sheep will keep the grass down. I bought them inexpensively as they are all young rams birthed this spring. In the fall I will sell them for mutton or we can use them for the estate. There is more than enough pasture for them. The feed won't cost a thing. They only have to be watered and the trough can be moved along with the fence so it won't ruin the lawn."

"Think of the smell," Lady Cora finally said. "Edith I can't a bunch of smelly sheep circling the house."

"They won't be close to the house, Mama. There is more than enough space. The Gardeners will still need to tend the lawn closest to the house."

"Robert!" Lady Cora exclaimed. She knew she was rapidly loosing the argument.

"Edith is right. We don't have the manpower to maintain the lawns properly and the sheep will nicely take care of the issue. Have the men carry on," he said.

Edith's smile was back as she turned back to what she was doing and signaled the men to get back to work.

At the end of August Edith was ready to put another of her ideas into practice but needed to hire at least one new farm hand. Whoever she hired needed to be able to grasp the new concepts she was experimenting with and have the ability to keep daily records. There were no replies to the advertisements for regular field hands so she had to think of something fast or have her plans ruined. An idea came to her one afternoon when she was leaving the local hospital and passing through the square in Downton on her bicycle. It just might work.

The following afternoon Lady Edith Crawley accompanied by the estate manager approached a group of ragged young men. The young men were all obviously veterans. Two of them had canes and one had a ragged scar that ran across his face. The other four had the gaunt haunted look Edith had seen at the hospital so many times with men who had serious injuries and would face slow recoveries. None of the men looked as though they were getting enough to eat. They were a pathetic lot, but she was desperate and it was worth a try.

"Hello, I'm Lady Edith Crawley," she began. The men's eyes turned towards her, a couple of them tipped their hats but most made no other movement. "I'm looking for workers for the home farm on my father's estate." At least two of the men turned their faces away from her. She took a breath and continued on. "I need someone who knows how to keep records and has experience working with poultry. The position isn't extremely physical, it includes a place to stay and three square meals a day." None of the men said anything to her. Her confidence was lagging a bit but she wasn't through trying. "I'll be in the village square by the large oak in the park for the next twenty minutes if any of you would like to apply for the position."

Edith walked away somewhat dejected. She had kept up a serene appearance while speaking to the men as she had been trained to do, but her hopes at finding anyone were fading fast. She went to sit on the park bench in the shade while the estate manager went to fetch her a cold drink from one of the shops. Edith had been sitting in the park discussing where they could next look for help when a ragged young man approached. He had a military canvas bag over his shoulder and was wearing an old pair of boots that had seen better days. His hair was shaggy and he had at least two weeks of beard on his face. The rags he was wearing for lack of a better word hung from his gaunt frame. He was twisting his cap in his hands nervously and his eyes were trained on the ground.

"I've come about the job, Milady," he said.

The estate manager was taken aback and shook his head slightly at Edith. Edith was undeterred. This would be her first time conducting a job interview and she was determined to at least attempt to ask a few questions.

"Have you ever worked with poultry before?"

"I used to work on the farms around here before the war," he said. "I've tended chickens."

"How much education do you have?"

"I went to a village school until I was fourteen."

"Can you drive?"

He shook his head no.

"Can you get up into a cart?"

Again he shook his head no.

"Would you be able to lift crates of eggs into a cart and carry pails of feed?"

He nodded his head.

"Let me tell you about the position," Edith said. "I'm starting a small poultry operation on the estate. I will be establishing three flocks of fifty hens each to begin with. I am going to experiment with different types of feed. Each flock will have its own feed and records will have to be kept of how much is given and how often. As well the hens will be individually weighed periodically to determine which feed is working best. You will have to gather the eggs, grade them, feed the hens and keep the pens clean and well maintained. Once the operation is established and I have determined which methods work best, I will increase the size of the flock. I was hoping to find someone who could deliver the eggs to the shop I have made arrangements with but I can make other arrangements. As long as you can load the eggs into the cart or lorry, I would have no objection hiring you."

The young man's head snapped up.

"Thank you, Milady," he said. The look on his face showed that he was almost ready to weep with gratitude.

"What is your name?" Edith inquired.

"John Biggs," he said with a strong Yorkshire accent.

"Mr. Biggs, as long as you perform the tasks required every day the rest of your time is your own. You will be provided with a small cottage that you will share with five other men once I have hired them. As well you will be provided with sufficient provisions for three meals a day. I expect your behavior not to reflect badly on myself or on my father's estate." Edith named a sum that wasn't huge but was more than the disabled man could expect to make if he was lucky enough to find work.

"Milady, will I have to. I mean to say, will I have to."

"No," Edith replied when she grasped what he was trying to ask. "When we get to the point of replacing the hens with younger ones, we will sell the birds live. The hens selected for use on the estate will be sent to the gamekeepers to be prepared. You won't have to kill anything."

"Thank you, Milady."

"Can you come with us now? We can wait while you collect your things."

"I don't have any things, Milady," he said obviously embarrassed.

Edith was a taken aback. She knew men were sent out of the hospitals as soon as they were well enough, but the Downton hospital catered to Officers. Was this what happened to boys from poor families when they were too ill to work?

"My manager will take you to the merchant's for some attire suitable for your position. He will charge it to the estate against your first month's wages," Edith said to preserve the man's dignity. She made a mental note to have one of the maids go through the storage cabinets at the main house to find one or two extra blankets and a decent pillow to be delivered to the man's accommodations.

John Biggs turned to follow the estate manager to the shops. Edith noticed as he walked away that his right leg turned out and drug slightly as he walked. She hoped she had made the right decision in hiring him, but she had little choice.


	10. Employees

Employees

The Battle of the Somme drew to a close in November 1916. It had been brutal and bloody with massive loss of life. Lord and Lady Grantham could no longer ignore the plight of the wounded at the Downton hospital and gave consent for the house to be used as a convalescent home. Edith was busy with her course work and had good success with her ventures in livestock thus far. Her small herd of cattle was doing nicely. Individual animals were sent to the butchers when a fresh supply of beef was needed. The sheep had also been sent to the butchers with half of them supplying meat for the estate. The sale of half the flock had turned a tidy profit and more than covered the wages for the man she had hired for the next six months. Edith wished she could find a few more like him.

Once he had gotten cleaned up, had regular meals and a decent place to sleep, John Biggs had regained a great deal of strength and proved a loyal worker. He had even made suggestions on how to improve the packaging of the eggs to prevent breakage on the way to market and had come up with ideas on how to fortify the pens to prevent animals getting in and killing the birds. He had done a good job and made it easy for her to complete her report to the university on her poultry project. As well her father was quite impressed with the small operation she was running and gave his permission for Edith to expand. Edith set about researching the relative merits of buying chicks versus keeping roosters. Between her and John, they determined it would be easier and save time to buy chicks. She had him build special nursery pens where the chicks would be raised until they got their feathers.

Sybil and Tom were busy with their move to London. Tom had been offered a position with one of the newly elected Labor Ministers and Sybil was due within the next month with their first child. Edith missed them a great deal. She had enjoyed having her sister and brother-in-law to talk to. They were one of the few family members who didn't make disparaging comments about her interests and encouraged her to pursue them. Tom had praised her scholastic efforts and given her pointers on how to prepare her reports and some of the finer details of preparing an academic paper.

Between her educational efforts, helping with the convalescent home and researching her projects Edith's days were full. She fell asleep at night the moment her head hit the pillow and she was up at dawn the next day. She still had moments of loneliness when a sight or passing comment would jog her memory. She would have liked to have someone special in her life, but for now her life was full and that would have to suffice.

One morning in January of 1917 Edith was going over some work planned for the spring with the Estate Manager when the topic of farm workers came up yet again. The last of the able bodied men employed on the farm had been called up over the last few months and they were out of options. Edith decided to try posting handbills at the enlisted hospitals and convalescent homes in the area. Disabled workers were better than no workers. Her first veteran employee had turned out to be an excellent worker. There was no reason to think it couldn't be repeated. The handbills were prepared and circulated to the hospitals. In mid-February Edith set out in the town car to make the rounds of the hospitals and convalescent homes she had contacted. She took John Biggs with her as she thought she might have better luck with him present.

At the first hospital they had no interest, but at the second hospital, John made the rounds of the convalescent wards and returned with two men who were willing to talk to Edith. They were both ready to be discharged and did not want to return to their families and burden them.

"You won't be a burden on the estate," Edith said. "There is work to be done and I can be flexible with your hours as long as tasks are accomplished in a timely manner. Mr. Biggs can attest to the working conditions. I can return tomorrow to collect you."

"Yes, Milady," they both said bobbing their heads.

At the next hospital they found one man who was willing to work for Edith. Another came to talk to her and then loudly proclaimed he would never work for a woman, let alone a woman farmer. John Biggs had gotten so angry Edith thought there was going to be an altercation.

By the end of the day, they had found five men who were willing to work on the estate farm. By the time Edith returned to the estate, relayed her information to the manager and refueled the car she was exhausted. She didn't want to attend the family dinner or deal with the questions she knew she would get from her family regarding her efforts but she felt obligated and dutifully changed for dinner.

"I don't understand your obsession with these men," Mary said. "How do you expect to turn a bunch of convalescents into a work force?"

"Mr. Bates and Mr. Biggs have both turned out to be excellent workers despite their wartime injuries," Edith said.

"Here, here, I quite agree," Lord Grantham contributed. "The men have served their country. It's the least we can do to afford them an opportunity."

"Why must we do it," Mary said. "Let them go elsewhere."

"Where do you expect me to find workers?" Edith said with a sudden flash of petulance. She was tired and Mary's attitude was starting to irk her. "Am I to pull them out of a magic hat?"

"I'm just trying to say, they would be better off in a convalescent home," Mary said starting to back pedal while trying to save face.

"There's no where for them to go," Edith said. "You don't realize what happens to some of them. They wind up living under bridges or worse. I need help. Your dining well tonight because of the efforts of the one man I already hired. We will have to hire more injured veterans before this war is over and there is nobody left."

Mary's eyes opened wide and Lady Cora was a bit taken back by Edith's attitude. Everyone had expected her to be easily cowed, but Edith was tired and more than a little fed up. Added to that was the man's attitude today who didn't want to work for a woman and she was more than a little frustrated.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize," Mary said.

"It's alright Mary. I'm tired and its been a long day," Edith said as way of an olive branch.

"You are to be commended, Edith," Lady Cora said trying to smooth things over. "You've taken on a lot. Just try not to over do it."

"Thank you, Mama," Edith said. "Do you mind if I don't join you in the drawing room tonight? I am very tired and I need to make arrangements for the cottage to be provisioned first thing in the morning for the men arriving tomorrow."

Lady Cora nodded her assent. Edith returned to her room as soon as the ladies retired from the dining room, took a bath and collapsed into bed. From downstairs she could hear the sounds of the men playing cards and chatting in the great hall. "Will this war never end?" she thought just before she drifted off.

Of the five men Edith had hired in February four turned out to be decent workers while the fifth one had been dismissed for drinking and picking fights after just three weeks at the estate. The estate manager assured Edith that dismissing men for drinking was a common occurrence before the war and not to blame her self for misjudging the man. They still needed more men before the spring planting season. The men got the work done but they were not as fast as able-bodied men and they would need one or two more men than normal to complete everything on schedule.

Edith had a meeting with the estate manager and the men she had already hired to ask for suggestions on how to go about hiring more veterans. Two of the men volunteered to assist her with talking to men at the convalescent homes and one said he would ask around his home village when next he was able to visit. She prepared handbills again and set about making arrangements to visit the hospitals.

This time with the men's help she was able to find another seven workers. Five of them were available immediately and the other two committed to working for her when they were released from the hospital in two weeks time. She felt the interviews and screening had gone much better with the men's help and they had turned away one man who was a heavy drinker before Edith even had a chance to speak to him.

Her small work force was gaining strength with regular meals and decent accommodation and the estate manager was pleased with the results of her efforts. There was some adjustment to each of the men's personal disabilities but by catering to each man's strengths, tasks were being accomplished in a reasonable amount of time and the farm was running efficiently.

Edith prepared a report on her efforts with using veterans as farm laborers and sent it to her professor, along with her other papers and regular reports. A reply came from her professor praising her for her efforts and innovative thinking in response the labor shortage. He asked if she would be interested in speaking about her efforts at a conference in Scotland in June. Edith was terribly flattered when she received her professor's comments but didn't think her father would allow her to go. After she had thought it over, she determined it was worth a try. It was a great honor and the worst her father could say was no.

"Papa," Edith ventured that afternoon while her father was sitting in his reduced library reading the paper. "I've received some comments on a report I submitted to the university I wanted to share with you. I've been invited to speak at a conference."

Her father folded his paper and reached for the papers Edith was carrying.

"Let me read things over before you get too carried away," he said. After he had read the comments from her professor and the copy of Edith's report, he sat in stunned silence for a moment. "I say, good show, Edith. You've done remarkably well."

Edith blushed at his compliment.

"I would like to attend," she said. "I thought I might ask Tom for some pointers on public speaking since he is a speech writer."

"Hmm, yes, quite so," her father remarked. He had made his peace with the man towards the end of the following year, before Sybil and Tom had moved to London. Sybil had put her foot down to her father's resistance and he had come to accept his daughter's marriage and his son-in-law at long last.

"Any idea who you would like to accompany you?" Lord Grantham asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I thought perhaps Mary or Aunt Rosamund," Edith said. "I'm sure both of them would have contacts they could visit with while I'm occupied at the university."

"You're being quite reasonable," Lord Grantham said. "Nothing like your younger sister."

"Oh, Papa, she was in love," Edith said rolling her eyes slightly. "This is entirely different."

"Well, you have my permission," he said. "I'm quite proud of what you've accomplished."

"Thank you, Papa," Edith leaned down and kissed him on the cheek before she left the library.


	11. Practice

Practice

"Look at your audience, speak clearly and practice," Edith's brother-in-law had told her repeatedly. There were two weeks remaining before the conference in Scotland and Edith had just returned from a week staying with her Aunt Rosamund and working with her brother-in-law Tom on her speech. Her speech was ready, she had the conference itinerary and the travel arrangements made. "Everything is ready except me," Edith said to her self the morning after her return. She was so nervous she couldn't sleep and was up before five in the morning. There was no sense going out to check on the home farm at this time of the morning. Even the chickens wouldn't be up. She took her folder containing her speech and headed to the family side of the portioned library to practice. Isis had lifted her head and looked at Edith when she entered only to flop her head back down and go back to sleep.

Edith was over half way through her twenty-minute speech when she felt someone watching her. She looked to the side of the partition separating the room to see a pair of green eyes accompanied by a head of thick brown hair peeking at her around the partition. She stopped in mid speech and walked over to confront her eavesdropper.

"Hello, who are you?" she said to the man who was bracing himself on a pair of crutches in his pajamas and robe. He was quite handsome despite his stubble and messy hair and Edith found herself catching her breath slightly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry. I heard a voice and came to investigate," he said with a New Zealand accent. "I'm Major Mark Goward. Who might you be?"

"Lady Edith Crawley. You must have just arrived. I've been away for a week. What are you doing here? Most of the men staying here are from the area?"

"I'm going to be laid up for a long time," he said. "They needed the bed in London. There was space here so they loaded me on the train and sent me up. What are you working on?"

"A speech for a conference, I'm attending," Edith said, "and you're not supposed to be up this early in the morning."

"I can't stand to lay there for more than five hours at a time," he said. "Can I hear your speech? I've been in hospital for six months now. I'm going a little crazy. I'd like to hear something different."

"I'm afraid its not that interesting," Edith said modestly. "Its for an agricultural conference."

"Really? Then it must be interesting. I live on a sheep station back home, what you would call a farm but somewhat larger."

"Very well," said Edith with a shrug, "but I'm not sure how interesting you will find it." She motioned for him to take a seat on one of the sofas and then began her speech. When she finished he applauded.

"It's a lovely speech and very well written," he said.

"My brother-in-law helped me. He's a political speechwriter. He told me to practice. I'm afraid I'm still awfully nervous."

"Have you really made it a point to employ disabled veterans?"

"It was more an act of desperation than kindness or social obligation," Edith replied. "The work has to be done and there was no one left to do it. I drove the tractor until the last group I hired had one man that could drive. He has lung damage from a gas attack so he can't do as much physical work. We've found that if we tailor each man's assigned tasks around his abilities we can get a great deal done."

"You must have met some resistance at first."

"Yes, I did. The estate manager wasn't too happy with the first man I hired, but couldn't do without him now. Even some of the men I approach don't want to work for a woman or doubted they could be of any use."

"You should do your speech for some of the lads here. I'm sure they would like to hear it."

"Oh, I couldn't," Edith said, getting embarrassed. "What will they think of me? Lady Edith Crawley, lady farmer and employer of the down and out! Really, I couldn't."

"There are some of the lads that should hear it. They need hope. Say you'll reconsider."

The sounds of the household starting to stir could be heard coming around the screen. Edith looked at the man who was obviously very lonely and nodded her head.

"Alright, I'll be around this afternoon. This morning I have to go and check on things with the home farm and meet with the manager."

"I'll see you then," he said with a small smile. He struggled back upright with his crutches. Edith moved to assist him with standing. When she took his arm, he pulled away from her slightly.

"I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" she asked.

"No, not at all," he said. "I'll see you this afternoon?"

"I'll be around," she said to him just before he turned to hobble back to the downstairs ward.

That afternoon Edith had a group of ten men waiting for her when she entered the ward in what had formerly been the drawing room. They all had farming backgrounds and wanted to hear what she had to say. She was a little flustered and tripped over the leg of a bed in her nervousness. It was decided that she would give her speech on the back patio in fifteen minutes for anyone who wanted to attend. Edith was surprised when she arrived to find even more of the men in wheel chairs and two or three on crutches had joined the original group and she now had an audience of twenty.

She was blushing madly as she took her place at the front of the group and began her speech. Once she settled into her speech and began talking about the issues of finding workers during a labor shortage, she forgot her hesitation and spoke with the passion she felt for the land and what they were accomplishing. When she finished her speech everyone clapped and then began asking her questions. They asked so many questions about the technical aspects of the farm and how the men had found their way around different physical disabilities Edith was a bit overwhelmed. Finally, the nurses insisted the men return inside for rest period.

The next afternoon Edith collected a few of the latest agricultural circulars from her collection and went downstairs to visit with the men and hand out library books. She found Major Goward laying in bed staring off into space.

"Hello," he said when he saw her. "I told you they would like your speech."

"I've had non-stop questions from a number of the officers," Edith replied with a smile. "It certainly seems a popular topic of conversation."

"No one talks about what will happen when you get home, but everyone thinks about it. You've done a good thing, Lady Edith."

"I've brought some of my circulars I thought you might be interested in," Edith said trying to shift the topic of conversation away from her self. "I have some of the newer technical books as well if you'd like to read them."

"I'd like that very much," he said with a faint smile. "When is your conference?"

"My Aunt and I are leaving next Wednesday for Scotland. I'll be gone five days."

"Perhaps you could bring back some notes and any pamphlets you come across? I won't be going anywhere."

"Do you mind me asking what is the nature of your injury?"

"I had a horse go down while I was riding it. It cut me up pretty bad and I broke my leg and my pelvis in five places. I will get better, but they tell me it will be another five months at least before I'm able to walk without assistance."

"Then you'll have to listen to my descriptions of farming everyday until you can't stand it anymore and have to get better to get away from me," Edith joked.

"I could listen to you everyday and never get tired of it," he said.

Edith blanched a little. She had visited hundreds of Officers in hospital and none of them had said anything remotely similar to her. Just then one of the Officers from the previous afternoon came by and stopped to ask her a question.

"I'll come and see you tomorrow," she said to Major Goward before she left him.

Edith stopped by to speak to Major Goward everyday until she left for Scotland. She had told him about her foray into sheep farming the previous year and about the two flocks she was running on the grounds for the summer. They were currently on the opposite side of the house from where the Officers were billeted and out of sight. He had laughed when she told him about the sheep getting out last summer and the trouble they had trying to get them back into the pens.

"It got to the point I had to place a call and have one of the local farmers bring his sheep dogs. We were still missing one until there was screaming coming from the servants' hall. They found the young ram, eating one of Mrs. Patmore's pies she had put to cool."

Mark Goward laughed and laughed at Edith's story and told her a few stories of his own troubles with getting sheep to do what he wanted them to do. They were seated on the back patio and he placed his hand over hers in a moment of laughter but just as quickly withdrew it.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"Have I offended you in some way?" Edith asked.

"No, no, not at all," he denied. "I quite enjoy your company. You leave for Scotland tomorrow?"

Edith renewed her promise to take notes at the conference and saw him back inside. That night while she was packing, she regarded herself in the mirror. "Am I really that hideous that he doesn't want to touch me?" she asked herself. She went to the drawer in the bottom of her wardrobe and looked at the mementos of her engagement. It had been almost two years. Their time together now seemed like a pleasant dream. "Someone once found me beautiful," she said to herself before she closed the drawer again and finished packing.

* * *

"A Lady Edith Crawley to see you Professor McPherson," the secretary introduced Edith. The elderly man behind the desk rose to greet Edith and stopped in his tracks.

"I wasn't expecting anyone so young and attractive," he said after he had recovered his shock. "Lady Edith, do come in." He motioned for her to take a chair in his office.

"A pleasure to meet you at last, Professor McPherson," Edith said.

"I was quite impressed with your report. Are you prepared for your presentation tomorrow?"

"Yes, I've been practicing my speech." Edith had a copy that she handed to him. He opened the folder and read it over.

"I'm very impressed. This is very well done," he said after a minute.

"I can't take all the credit," Edith said. "My brother-in-law is a professional speechwriter, he helped me with it and I've been practicing on the men at the convalescent home on my family estate."

"Still the initial idea to use disabled veterans was your own. You've found a way to effectively manage a widespread problem. It's not everyone who can do that."

Edith colored at the compliment. They continued to talk for another fifteen minutes regarding future projects Edith had planned for the home farm and her plans to recruit workers for the fall harvest. By the end of the session Professor McPherson had given Edith a list of books he though she might find useful that were available at the university bookstore. Edith thanked him for his help and vote of confidence before she left his office for the day.

The next day Edith's hands trembled as she took the podium at the conference. Her Aunt Rosamund was sitting in the front row and stuck out like a brightly colored bird in the male dominated audience. Edith had noticed a few women at the conference. They all were much older than her self and looked weathered from their lives outdoors. At the end of Edith's speech a number of men in army uniforms jumped to their feet to give her a standing ovation and the remainder of the crowd soon followed. Edith blushed and felt somewhat flustered at so much attention. She almost fell off the bottom step as she left the stage.

During the lunch break so many of the attendees approached her to ask questions and offer their congratulations she wasn't able to eat a bite of her lunch. Before they left the conference for the afternoon, a reporter from one of the circulars she had been reading regularly approached her for an interview. Edith was in such a state of shock from her reception at the conference she answered the reporter's questions without being able to remember one of the questions he asked.

Over the next few days of the conference, Edith enjoyed herself thoroughly and compiled a large collection of pamphlets and circulars as well as the books her professor had recommended. As well she had a notebook full of notes to discuss with Major Goward. Her Aunt Rosamund had complained profusely at the amount Edith proceeded to cram into both of their bags, but at the same time had enjoyed being at the center of so much male attention along with her niece.

Edith had thought of Major Mark Goward a number of times while she was in Scotland. She had found herself making a mental note of things she would like to discuss with him when she returned and picking up extra copies of pamphlets she thought he might enjoy. A few times she had chided herself for her interest in the man and in the same instant thought what could it hurt to admire someone who would eventually move on anyway. He certainly didn't like her that way, but it felt nice to dream.


	12. Confessions

Confessions

Edith had enjoyed quite a bit of celebrity from the conference. The article she had been interviewed for had been published in July and two of the local papers had asked her for interviews shortly afterwards. Once the articles were out she had received a number of letters from other landowners praising her for providing a solution to the labor issue that they themselves could attempt and a number of letters from young men looking for work. She reviewed the list of applicants with the Estate Manager and created a list of men willing to work to hand around the other farms in the area she knew were looking for workers. She had personally replied to every letter she had received.

Her friendship with Major Goward was growing and he eagerly anticipated her visit everyday. Each day he had an article or section of a book marked that he wanted to discuss with her. He paid her a number of compliments but continued to avoid any physical contact. At the beginning of September he had graduated to walking with a pair of canes and Edith asked him if he might like to go out and see the home farm with her in the town car. The weather was still nice and warm and Edith assured him they could stop and rest if he tired too quickly. They set off the next afternoon with a picnic hamper in the back, an assortment of blankets and some cold drinks.

Edith's first stop was her poultry project. She was quite proud of it and despite the heat there was relatively little odor. John Biggs was in charge of the poultry now and he was a stickler for regular cleaning. The next stop was one of the fields where Edith was attempting to diversify the crops and then on to the beef cattle. They went through a small gate into a meadow where the cattle were grazing. Edith had brought a couple blankets from the car and two bottles of cider.

"I hope I haven't tired you out too much," she said when they were finally seated. The cattle lay around the field in the afternoon heat chewing their cud or mooing softly. It was a relaxing scene from their vantage point in the shade.

"Not at all, I'm enjoying being out. I haven't seen anything but a hospital ward or the inside of your home for the last eight months. Not that your home isn't beautiful," he corrected quickly.

"You don't have to tell me that it can be a bit much," Edith said. "My younger sister practically ran away from it all when she married her husband."

"What about you? Do you ever want to run away from it all?" he asked.

"I almost did once," Edith said suddenly looking wistful, "but the war changed that."

"How?"

"My fiancé died," Edith said turning back to look at him. "It was in the early part of the war. He was a flier from Canada."

"The war changes a lot of things," he said taking a pull from his bottle of cider. After a few minutes he said, "I always thought I would go home and marry the girl next door, but I found out she wanted the prestige of being a the wife of a wealthy land owner more than she wanted me. I got a letter three weeks after I was injured, Dear Mark, don't bother writing back I've married someone else."

"That's terrible," Edith said. "I don't know how anyone can be that callous. It does happen though more often people think. I've been visiting the wounded for almost two years and you're not the only one. I certainly couldn't do it to someone."

"Are you sure about that? Even if what was left was hideous?"

"I'm sure," Edith said.

"I'm hideous," he said, looking away from her.

"What are you talking about? You are far from hideous," Edith said. "Have you looked in the mirror lately?"

He started to laugh. "You don't see the other bit, that's covered up."

"Then show me and I'll tell you if its hideous or not," Edith said. She was nervous at being so forward. They weren't even on a first name basis and she was asking to see the man's scars.

"Alright, you want to see," he said suddenly annoyed and turning to look at her. His face was bright red. "I'll show you why I can't even hold your hand." He roughly pulled his tie free and began undoing the buttons of his uniform shirt. He pulled it off and then pulled off the undershirt he was wearing.

Edith was opened mouthed at his sudden burst of anger, until she realized what he had said. He didn't find her hideous at all. Across his chest and side was a spider web of scars. She reached out and tentatively ran her fingers along the longest one.

"It's not that bad," she said. "They're red now but they'll fade with time. I don't think you're hideous at all, quite lovely in fact. I thought you found me repulsive."

The anger suddenly went out of him.

"Why would I?" he said. "You're Lady Edith Crawley. You can have any man you want."

"Hardly," Edith said.

"You were engaged."

"To a farmer just like me," Edith said with a self-deprecating laugh. "He was the only man whoever paid the least attention to me."

"I find that hard to believe." He was buttoning his shirt back up with shaky fingers.

"Most men prefer my sisters."

"I've seen your older sister. She is nothing like you."

"No, we're quite different."

"I prefer you."

"That's nice of you to say."

"Edith, can I call you that?"

Edith nodded.

"Edith, I'm such a mess and I have no right to ask you, but would you kiss me?"

In answer she scooted over closer to him and placed her lips against his. He didn't respond to her first tentative kiss. As Edith drew away embarrassed by his lack of response, he placed his hand on her cheek and kissed her back. Edith had forgotten what it was like to be kissed by a man who found you attractive. Her body responded to his closeness and she felt the pull of attraction that had lain dormant for the last two years. When he finally released her all she could think to say was, "I've knocked over your cider."

Mark began to laugh, he laughed till he was almost crying and Edith laughed with him. He pulled her close and lay back on the blanket.

"You are absolutely without a doubt, the most interesting woman I have ever met," he said.

"Is that good or bad?" Edith questioned him.

"It's what makes you so damn attractive," he said before he kissed her again.

They finished up their tour of the estate by Edith taking Mark to see the apple orchards. She had an idea she wanted some feedback on and this was a perfect opportunity. By the time she got him back to the house, he was visibly tired.

"Thank you for a delightful afternoon," he said before they parted. "Perhaps we could do it again soon."

"I'll make some arrangements and let you know," Edith said. She was smiling happily when she headed into dinner that night with her family.

"You look happy," her mother commented. "Did something happen, Edith?"

"No, not much," she said non-committedly. "I've had an idea for a community party this fall. I've been working out the details."

"What type of party?" Mary questioned.

"Well, I've been thinking that it's silly to leave all the apples to the deer after what we need is picked. I'd like to have an orchard party for the Officers and invite the school children and the people from the village. The villagers could pick the apples and it would give the Officers a change of scenery. We wouldn't have to provide the elaborate foods associated with a garden party, just lemonade or some punch with a few sandwiches."

"That's a lovely idea," Lady Cora said. "I'll talk to Mrs. Hughes about it tomorrow. Do you have any idea of the date?"

"I'll double check the schedule for when the apples are to be harvested and let you know Mama."

"How are your studies going?" Lord Grantham asked Edith. "Any brave new projects?"

"I do have one, Papa. I am experimenting with keeping leeks in the ground through the winter. It looks a bit odd, but if it works we should have fresh leeks through till at least April. The following year, we can try other crops with similar techniques. I'll be finished my program in the spring."

"Well, the party sounds like a fine idea," her father said in way of encouragement.

The next day Edith went into the wards for her time with the Officers and couldn't find Mark anywhere. His things were still by his bed, but he was nowhere to be found. She went outside to the patio to see him slowly making his way across the lawn without the use of his canes. She dashed across the lawn towards him, ready to scold him for trying something so fool hardy.

"Mark, where have you been?" she said with a worried expression on her face. She had almost expected him to pack and run away after he had kissed her yesterday.

"I went to look at your sheep," he said. "I've had enough of those canes. I wanted to go on my own speed." He was sweating profusely and looked a little wobbly from his trip. Edith went to stand beside him and put her arm around his waist. His arm went around her shoulders and she could feel him sagging against her.

"You're being foolish," Edith scolded. "You'll have a set back."

"No, I won't," he said sticking out his chin stubbornly.

"If you don't behave, I won't take you for a picnic tomorrow."

"Don't they need you on the estate?" he was still being stubborn and not wanting to give in.

"No, I have more than enough men hired. Don't you want to go?"

They had made it back as far as the patio and he sat down on one of the chairs.

"Of course I do," he said taking her hand. "I just don't like having to share you with the other Officers."

"Well, you're going to have to," Edith said getting her own back for his earlier obstinacy.

"You aren't going to make this easy for me are you?"

"You're going to have to wait. I'll pick you up tomorrow at one," Edith said as she turned to walk into the house. She looked back over her shoulder to see him looking at her sheepishly.

"Could you get me my canes, please?"

Edith dashed back and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before she said, "I'll be right back."


	13. By the Creek

By the Creek

The next afternoon Edith retrieved Mark from the convalescent ward and drove away from the estate to an abandoned farm. She turned into an old lane and drove them as far back as she dared towards a creek.

"I'm sorry I can't go any closer," she said. "We won't have any space to turn around."

It was a warm, stuffy day and the cool air coming from the creek was a pleasant relief. Edith carried the basket and blankets, while Mark made his way slowly beside her. He had definitely overdone it the day before and he was stiff.

"I'm sorry I'm not much help," he said.

"By this time next year, you won't even think about it," Edith said. "You can't give up."

They reached a quiet glade beside the creek where there was a small waterfall coming over some rocks. It was an idyllic spot that made you think fairies and nymphs would emerge at any moment from the surrounding forest if you sat quietly enough.

"I wish I had your optimism," he said.

"I learned to drive didn't I?" Edith said with a hint of mischief. "I was hopeless when I first began."

"You couldn't have been that bad!"

"That's what you think," Edith said. She told Mark of her many failed attempts when learning to drive and the many mistakes she had made. "I don't know how Tom stood me. He was our chauffeur before he married my sister."

"Your sister married the chauffeur? I thought you said he was a speechwriter."

"He is. His career took a small detour while he romanced my sister. After they married he worked as a reporter and then moved to politics."

"So your father is an understanding man?"

"Hardly that. There was a terrible row when they told everyone they were married. I felt sorry for him. He's a very nice man, but the rest of them just couldn't see it. My sister and her husband have always encouraged me even no one else did."

"My sister is running the farm back home in my absence. She hates it."

"When do you think, you'll return?" Edith asked.

"When I'm well enough, which is obviously not now. It's a long hard trip. We live on the South Island. After the sea voyage it is another long trip home. It's beautiful there you would like it."

They had finished their picnic lunch and put away the dishes.

"What's it like?" Edith asked. Mark had lain down on his side on the blanket. He couldn't manage to sit up for too long.

"Green rolling hills as far as you can see with fences and sheep. You can see the tops of the mountains in the distance from the house."

"It sounds lovely," Edith said.

"And quiet. I couldn't wait to leave. Now all I want is to go home and raise sheep and live a quiet life."

"Not too quiet or you will be an old man before your time," Edith teased.

Mark tried to roll onto his back and groaned.

"If I get anymore stupid ideas kick me in the shins," he said.

"Where does it hurt?" Edith asked.

"Everywhere."

Edith went to the stream and brought back the cider that was chilling in the water, uncorked a bottle and handed it to him. He took a drink without sitting up. She took the bottle from him took a drink and put it to the side. She started undoing the buttons of his shirt.

"What are you doing?" he asked trying to pull the fronts of his shirt back together and blushing.

"You said it hurts. I'll rub your chest and back for you, but you have to take off your shirt. If you leave it on, I'm liable to snag your tie and choke you with it." She knocked his hands out of the way and finished unbuttoning his shirt and pulled off his tie. She started to rub the muscles on the side of his neck and slowly worked her way lower onto his chest. He lay watching her for any sign of revulsion, but she kept rubbing his chest until he sighed and started to relax. He slid his hand into her hair and pulled her down for a long kiss. Edith was careful not to put any weight on him.

The bugs danced by the sides of the stream, the sound of the water combined with the songs of the birds in the trees overhead made time feel like it was standing still. Edith's heart was pounding as she pulled back. His lips were moist and slightly parted from their kiss and he pulled her back for more.

"This wasn't quite the type of rubbing I meant when I said I would rub your chest for you," she said when she pulled back. She undid the cuffs of his shirt and began to pull his sleeves off his arms. She began rubbing the arm closest to her, he snuck his hand around her side and traced it up her ribs. His eyes opened slightly in surprise when he realized she wasn't wearing a corset. She finished with the one arm went to the other side and rubbed that one too. The left side had the most scaring and there were lines on his arm as well. She took a mouthful of cider and leaned over letting it trickle from her mouth into his while he kissed her.

Once they had broken off the kiss Edith pushed on his shoulder for him to roll over.

"It's not fair," he complained in a low tone. "You have me at a disadvantage."

"I have you right where I want you," Edith said. "Now roll over."

He finally managed to comply. The scaring ran around onto his back as well and disappeared into the waistband of his trousers. Edith slowly caressed his back and then increased the pressure. Some of the muscles were knotted into hard rocks and she kept rubbing until she felt some of them release. Finally she pushed on him to roll back over. He reached to pull her down again, but she knocked his arms away. He hands went to the waistband of his trousers and she started to undo the buttons.

"Edith I can't, at least not yet."

"I want to see it," she said. "All of it. I don't want you to be embarrassed anymore."

He nodded and finished undoing his trousers. He undid his drawers as well and pushed them down. Edith had to finish pulling them off, as he couldn't move well enough kick them off. She ran her hands over his hip where the worst of the scaring was and down his left leg. She massaged his leg then turned her attention to the other one. When she finally allowed herself to look at his genitals she was a bit shocked by the site of a fully erect male in broad daylight. Her previous experience had been in a darkened bedroom with only the faint glow of the moon coming through the windows. This was something totally different.

She moved to lie beside Mark and placed her head along side his on the pillows she had brought. He looked into her eyes with a small smile as he turned onto his side and pulled her close for a long kiss. He slowly pulled her closer so just his chest was resting on her. He took his time stroking her tongue with his and trailing kisses across her face and jaw.

"Are you feeling better?" Edith whispered in his ear.

"You are the best medicine in the world," he replied between kisses. His fingers slid the buttons of her blouse open and he cupped her breast through the silk of her undergarments. His thumb rubbed her nipple until it was nothing but a bundle of sensation. He was kissing her neck at the same time and slid his lips lower to the edge of her garments.

"Will you take them off? All of them?" he asked against her lips. "Be with me as much as we can?"

She meekly nodded and quickly pushed off her clothing. She returned to lying beside him and moved as close as she dared so as not to inadvertently bump into any of his injuries.

"It wasn't fair, you know," he said as she snuggled in close beside him. "You got to see me, now I want to see you." He looked at her appreciatively lying naked beside him.

"You're as beautiful as a statue by a master," he said before his lips closed back over hers. He kissed her lips and trailed kisses down to her nipples. Edith ran her fingers through his hair and rubbed the skin of his shoulders and torso. He played with the indentation of her navel and traced his fingers along the edge of her pubic hair. His lovemaking was different that what she had experienced with Bill. Bill had a practiced sureness about him that Mark lacked. Mark's actions were more awkward and hesitant but were delivered with a desire to please. Edith rolled a little further onto her back and moved her legs apart so he could explore her. She slid her hand down to stroke him and run her fingers around the swollen head of his penis. She was a mass of desire and had to fight the urge to wrap he legs around him and pull him inside her. His fingers explored her gently touching each fold and crease as though she were made of the finest porcelain. When he finally found the perfect spot that was driving her to a frenzied pitch, she whispered against his lips, "Yes, there, that's perfect."

She stroked him faster and firmer running her fingers over the head until she cried out and bucked her hips against his hand. He came quickly but was unable to move and his semen landed on her side and on the blanket. Edith watched it pour out of him and glanced up to see the look of intense pleasure on his face. She placed a light kiss on his mouth and put her arm around him. It was fascinating to her to actually see what happened to a man at the moment of his orgasm. He squiggled around until he was lying on his back again. He moved his arm closest to her so he could pull her close but not so it would take her weight. They lay there together for a long time saying nothing.

"How long before you can, you know do the other?" Edith finally asked him. Her cheeks colored at her question.

"At least another two months, so the Doctors say. Even then it will have to be inventive. At least we know everything works. I'm sorry I made such a mess."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Edith said. "Your handsome just the way you are."

"I suppose we have to go back soon. I don't really want to."

"And where would you like to go?" Edith teased.

"Shopping!"

"Whatever for?"

"It's a secret," he said with a wicked grin. "I haven't been shopping in almost a year."

"Alright, I'll take you tomorrow. Ripon is the closest. There's a new tractor I've been wanting to look at anyway."

"A girl after my own heart," he said with a chuckle.

When they arrived back at the Abbey, Lord Grantham came out front to meet them.

"Where have you two been? You've missed tea."

"We were out exploring, Papa," Edith said.

Mark's face colored slightly.

"Nothing too strenuous, I hope," Lord Grantham said, his eyes narrowed when he looked at the younger man.

"No, Sir," Mark managed to choke out. Edith was standing by his side blushing profusely. The perspiration was starting to bead on Mark's forehead. Christ he had to stop this, he was acting like a naughty teenager. They hadn't even gone all the way. "Lady Edith has been showing me some of the countryside."

"How much longer are you expecting to stay?"

"Another three months at least, Sir."

"Yes, well carry on. Just watch your step young man."

"I intend to, Lord Grantham."

Edith's mother approached her as soon as they got inside and Mark made a hasty retreat back to his assigned bed. "What a damn mess, I am," he thought to himself. "I can't even make love to a girl properly." His emotions were skyrocketing all over and it was all he could do to get his pajamas on and get into bed.

When he heard the man in the next bed coming into the room, he pulled the covers over his head. The man was a walking encyclopedia of off color comments.

"I heard you were out with the blonde today," he said louder than appropriate. "How was she? Did she squeal in that posh voice of hers?"

Mark threw back the covers and pushed him self up so fast it took the other man by surprise.

"If you ever make another rude comment about Lady Edith, her sisters or any other woman on this property, I swear I will finish what the Gerry's started. Do you understand me Lieutenant?"

"Yes, Sir," the dumbstruck man said.

Mark flopped himself back into bed. He didn't want to think anymore today. He closed his eyes and tried to block everything out, but his dreams were filled with a blonde haired woman and the sensation of sunlight streaming through the trees onto his naked body. He woke up through the night when a muscle decided to cramp. At least these dreams were better than the ones he had been having for the last eight months, he thought to himself. He fell asleep again wondering how Edith would look lying in the straw in the hayloft back home.


	14. Shopping

Shopping

There was no way Edith and Mark were making it out the door the next day on their own. Gossip spread like wild fire among the recovering Officers. As soon as it was discovered that Lady Edith was driving Major Goward into Ripon to go shopping the following afternoon another four of the convalescing men whose injuries prevented them from taking the bus showed up at the door to wait for her. Edith's eyes opened wide at the sight of the group of men. Her heart dropped at the prospect of loosing what she had hoped would be a romantic outing to the needs of the men. One of the men was about to hop into the front seat with Edith when a look from Major Goward sent him scurrying to the back seat. They were all very excited to be going shopping and asked where they might find an assortment of shops. None of them had been to a store for at least six months and their money was burning a hole in their pockets.

Edith pulled up to a central location and pointed out a teashop where the men should wait for her at an appointed time. It took a few minutes for them all to get out of the town car with their assortment of canes and crutches, but they were soon delivered and Edith pulled away.

"I wanted to go shopping too," Mark said.

"Then you should have gone with them," Edith said. "I told you I wanted to look at a tractor."

"They gossip too much. I don't want them to know what I'm shopping for."

"And what is this deep, dark secret?" Edith said with a smirk as she pulled up to the machinery dealer.

"You'll see."

They went in to look at the tractor. Mark was knowledgeable and asked a number of questions Edith hadn't though of. After twenty minutes they were finished and headed back to the shopping area. Edith asked Mark where he wanted to go first. His first stop was a pharmacy. Edith waited in the car for him. He came back after a few minutes and asked Edith to go to the local men's wear shop. He came out with a large packet and placed it in the boot.

"The man in the store said there is just what I'm looking for one street over and one block up," Mark said.

"That's the top of High Street," Edith said. "What on earth do you want there?"

"You'll see," he said with a grin.

Edith found a space to park on the high street and then got out of the car. Mark had come around to her side. He directed her to hold his arm and keep her eyes closed.

"I'm going to fall on my nose," Edith said.

"No, you wont," he sounded like a child on Christmas morning. Edith heard the doorbell tinkle as they entered a shop. "Keep your eyes closed or you'll ruin the surprise," he warned her.

Edith could sense him pointing out something to the man behind the counter but had no idea what it was. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he told her to open her eyes. They were in the most expensive jewelry shop in the small town. Laid out on the counter in front of them was a set of amethyst earrings, necklace, and matching hair combs. Beside that were three rings in different colors and settings.

Mark was looking at her expectantly with a large smile on his face.

"Which of the rings do you like?" he asked. "I like the opal but its up to you."

"Mark what is all this?" Edith said still not understanding.

"Your engagement ring and gift. Will you wear my ring and go back to New Zealand with me when its time?"

"Mark, I don't know what to say. Oh my, you've taken me by surprise," Edith blushed and put a hand to her mouth. After a minute she looked at him and nodded.

"I will."

She looked at the rings on the counter for a moment. "I like the opal one as well. I would very much like to wear it."

"Good, then we'll take the amethysts and the opal ring. Do you see anything else you fancy?"

"Mark you can't buy it all in one go!"

"Why not? What's the use of a trust fund if you can't spend it? I haven't used it since I signed up three years ago. Would you rather I got you the tractor? We could stop by and order that too, but I would rather get you a new one when we get back to New Zealand."

"Mark this is crazy and no I don't want the tractor today," Edith's head was spinning. "I thought you said you're a sheep farmer."

"I am."

"Just how big is this farm?"

"I think my sister's reduced the herd to thirty percent of normal in my absence, but its still rather large. It's the second largest station on the south island. It's a family owned operation. It pays dividends. My sister and I both have trusts. You'll live a nice life Edith. I can afford it."

Edith found a chair in the shop and sat down with a plop.

"Would you like the ring sized, Sir?" the man behind the counter asked.

"Yes, and I would like it prepared this afternoon," Mark said.

"There is an extra charge for rush work, Sir."

"Just do it. How much do I owe you?" Mark pulled out his checkbook and began to write out a draft. Edith's eyes opened wide at the amount. She didn't have a lot of experience with money but from her working with the estate accounts she knew it was a considerable amount.

"We'll be back in two hours for the ring and the other items," he said.

"Very well, Sir," the clerk said with a smile while fingering the bank draft.

Once they were out on the street, Edith put her arm through his and asked him where he would like to go next.

"I don't know," Mark said. "Somewhere we can get a cup of tea."

Edith could see that he was starting to tire from navigating streets with rough cobblestones. She got him back to the car and then headed back to the teashop where they had left the other men. It was midafternoon and the shop was fairly quiet. None of the men had returned yet. Edith was quiet while they placed their order. She kept her eyes downcast.

"What's the matter, Edith?" he questioned. He took her hand and kissed the back of it. "Aren't you happy?"

"I am. I'm just in shock. It was only a few days ago I thought you didn't like me. Now we're engaged and I've agreed to move to the other side of the world with you. I can't even think what my family is going to say."

"You don't think they'll be happy for us, do you?" he asked somewhat dejected.

"I think they'll be happy to get me off their hands, but they can be difficult. Except my younger sister, she is such a rebel she'll only care if I am happy. I do feel lucky you have chosen me," she said squeezing his hand.

Their order came and Edith could see Mark starting to relax. He had so many confidence issues yet to overcome with his injuries and he was far from well.

"Would you mind if we don't have a long engagement?" Edith asked. "I don't want to wait."

"How soon do you want to get married?" he questioned. "I would like to be able to at least get down the isle on my own."

"I wouldn't care if you were carried in on a stretcher," Edith said. "The thing is, when you're a wife you have rights. When you're a fiancée you don't."

"His death still bother's you doesn't it?" he asked taking her hand.

"I would at least like to know where his grave is," Edith said. "I'm not a direct relation so they wouldn't even tell me that much. I didn't even really know him all that well. He was wild and reckless and fun and liked to grow apples."

"And you miss him?"

"Not so much since I met you," Edith confessed, "My life is different now. My days are full. I used fight with Mary all the time. It's time to move on."

"We can get married whenever you like. I'll live with it. At least I know you accepted me the way I am, not because of anything else. Not like before."

"She hurt you very badly, didn't she?"

"Yes and no. I didn't love her. My pride was hurt more than anything. When I was laying under that horse tangled in Constantia wire, things became very clear to me. I was doing what was expected of me, getting engaged to whom I was told and signing up to serve the empire. I even attended a school that was chosen for me. I was there for hours before they came to cut me out. I don't know if I'll ever be able to ride a horse again. The nightmares have just started to slow down since I met you. I want to be a farmer and live a simple life."

The other men started to show up for the ride home. They all had multiple packages and were quite pleased with themselves and the items they had purchased. They all loaded into the car and waited while Edith made the trip back into the jewelry store to pick up Mark's purchase.

When they got back to Downton Mark stayed with Edith while she went to refuel the car. As they walked towards the house from the garage they stopped by a bench under a large elm tree. Mark took out the ring and slid it onto Edith's finger.

"I promise to stay true to you until the day that I die," he said.

Edith smiled happily at the sight of the ring on her finger. "Just make sure that day is when we're both old and grey," she said.

Carson was there to greet them when they came in the door.

"Mr. and Mrs. Branson have just arrived Milady," he said.

"Thank you Carson," Edith said happily. She turned to Mark. "You'll come to dinner tonight won't you? We can tell my family then."

"Yes, that's fine," he said before he went to lie down and recuperate from their shopping trip.

Edith went to collect Mark just before eight that night. She was dressed in her finery and wearing the jewelry he had purchased for her that afternoon. He was freshly shaved and dressed in his uniform. He offered her one arm and made his way towards the library with her with the use of one cane.

"You look lovely," he told her.

"So do you. Papa is in the library waiting for the others. Now's your chance to talk to him."

Edith walked into the library with Mark and greeted her father.

"Papa, Mark's got something he wants to ask you."

Mark looked as though he would like to bolt out the door, but steadied himself against one of the sofas and smiled at Edith. She went to wait just outside the library doors while he spoke to her father. The Dowager Countess arrived for dinner while Edith was waiting and eyed Edith speculatively.

"You look like the cat, that's swallowed the canary, Edith. What's going on?"

Just then Lady Cora, Mary, Sybil and Tom arrived from upstairs.

"Major Mark Goward has asked me to marry him and I've accepted. He's talking to Papa now," she said. She had a wide, glowing smile.

"Edith's already had two proposals and Sybil is a happily married woman. You must get on with it Mary," the Dowager Countess proclaimed.

"Oh, Granny," Mary groaned.

Lady Cora kissed Edith on the cheek. "I'm so happy for you, darling."

Sybil and Tom offered Edith their congratulations while Lady Violet, the Dowager Countess forged ahead into the library to find out what was going on.

"Nothing stops her," Sybil muttered to her husband as they headed inside.

From the look on Mark's face Edith could tell things weren't going well.

"Edith," her father said. "I don't like the idea of you marrying a man who is practically an invalid and moving half way around the world to God only knows where."

Edith moved over beside Mark and got him seated before she took a seat beside him.

"I told you, I'm not an invalid," Mark said. His drawl was more pronounced. "It's only temporary. We can visit every few years. I can well afford it."

"Another colonial, dear?" her grandmother chimed in. "And this one from even further afield than the last?"

Edith had been looking down at her hands and was about to break out in tears. When her grandmother's word galvanized her into action.

"Mark and I are getting married," Edith said. "As soon as it can be arranged. Whether all of you want to admit it or not, I'm an old maid. I want to be a farmer's wife, not just twiddle my days away on the home farm."

Lord Grantham and the senior members of the family were shocked to have Edith make so strong a statement. Sybil and Tom shared a smile between them. Lord Grantham caught their look and turned towards them.

"I suppose you had something to do with this?"

"What makes you say that," Tom said levelly with a feigned air of innocence. He had learned over the years not to let his father-in-law bait him. "We've only just arrived."

At the sound of Tom's accent and his smooth handling of his father-in-law Mark got a slight smirk on his face and Edith hid a giggle behind her hand. Lord Grantham knew when he was caught in the cross hairs with his younger daughters and finally let out a sigh.

"Very well then," he said. "You have my permission. Edith I hope you'll both be very happy."

"Thank you, Papa," she said. Edith and Mark hung back with Sybil an Tom so they could be introduced while the others moved ahead of them into the dining room.

"Don't mind their father," Tom told Mark as he shook his hand. "He screamed so loud when we told him we were married they could hear him in the servants' hall."

"Tom, you're exaggerating," Sybil chided him. "He was only loud enough to be heard on the first floor. It was me who yelling back loud enough to be heard downstairs."

Mark and Edith smiled at each other as they moved through to the dining room.

"You weren't kidding when you said difficult." Mark whispered to Edith. He nodded towards Tom. "He certainly knows how to handle them."

"Just watch and learn," Edith murmured to him with a smile as they entered the dining room and went to take their seats.


	15. Therapy

Therapy

Mark Goward was in the process of getting dressed the next morning when Tom Branson showed up with a baby that looked to be nine or ten months old hanging over his arm chewing on his father's keys.

"I've come to warn you. My wife has a bee in her bonnet. She wants you moved to better accommodations. She says you're to be part of the family, so you should be treated as such. When she gets like this there's no stopping her."

"What does Edith say?"

"She's all for it. They're busy talking their mother into everything they want right now. Sybil always gets her own way. The old lady and their Aunt got a hold of me when I had pneumonia. Dressed me up and presented me like a pig on a platter to their friends."

"You make it sound like an ordeal," Mark said with a grimace.

"It can be," Tom said with a slight smile. "It all works out. I have to get going. This is a working trip. I'll come and get you away from them this afternoon when I get back if you're up to it. I'll see you later."

"Bye," Mark said as Tom headed out of the room.

"Who was the Irish git with the baby?" one of the men in the room asked him.

"Lord Grantham's son-in-law _and_ my future brother-in-law." Mark replied with an annoyed look at his comment.

The other man visibly shrunk.

An hour later Edith accompanied by her sister Lady Sybil and Major Clarkson, the hospital surgeon, showed up to talk to Mark. Edith was looking nervous and twisting her hands together, while Sybil was the picture of serenity.

"Let's go through into the library where we can have some privacy," Major Clarkson said.

"What's going on?" Mark asked once they were all assembled.

"As you may know, Lady Sybil is a nurse," Major Clarkson said. "She has requested you be given one of the bedrooms on the second floor. I agree with her that the stairs would be excellent exercise as long as you avoid the main staircase."

"There's a little more you should know," Edith said looking worried. "Sybil's decided to give you her room, so you will have a private washroom. Papa wasn't too pleased, but Mama agreed so he couldn't stop us."

"I can't take your room," Mark said to Sybil.

"Certainly you can. It's not like we're here very often. We can stay in Aunt Rosamund's room. Once we've gotten you upstairs and determined which staircase would be best for you, we'll start on your new therapy routine. I've spoken with your therapist and determined a new course of action. I'll take care of it for the next three days while I'm here and instruct Edith on some basic techniques. Then you will receive private therapy sessions as well as the group sessions with the other patients," Sybil said in her smooth aristocratic tones. She was sitting on a chair with her hands folded as if she were conducting a tea party instead of orchestrating his recovery. "Major Clarkson has already approved my suggestions."

"Do I get any say in all of this," Mark asked.

"You have the choice of a long, slow, painful recovery or following Lady Sybil's suggestions which should speed up the process considerably," Major Clarkson said.

Mark was beginning to see why Tom Branson had come to warn him this morning.

Mark was left alone with Edith while Sybil went to find some of the household staff to move his things to her and Tom's bedroom.

"I hope you aren't too upset with me," Edith said.

"Why should I be?"

"We've made a lot of decisions without your consent. Well, Sybil did," Edith rolled her eyes slightly.

"Should I be concerned?" Mark asked Edith. He was somewhat amused by the entire thing. He put a hand under Edith's chin and turned her face to look at him.

"Oh no," Edith exclaimed in a rush. "She is a very good nurse. The patients under her care usually do very well."

"I'll have to take your word for it," he said before he gave her a quick kiss. "Now let's go find your sister and get started."

Sybil showed Mark one of the servant's staircases that led to the second floor that was fairly narrow with a handrail on one side.

"You can steady yourself against the wall" Sybil said. "The more times you go up and down the stairs in a day, the stronger you will get. At first it is going to seem like a chore. If you feel dizzy or like you are going to fall when you descend. Turn around and come down backwards."

Mark looked at the narrow staircase with trepidation. He could see up all four stories of stairs. It was an imposing sight.

"You're only going up one story," Edith said. "Try not to look up."

He made it up the first flight of stairs before he had to stop for a breather.

"You're sure about this?" he said to Sybil.

"Positive. Now try the second flight. It's the blue door at the top."

He went through the door and found himself in a corridor with five doors leading off it. They moved down to the second door and went in. It was one of the most effeminate rooms he had ever seen. He felt a little queasy at having to spend his nights in this den of feminine splendor. A huge bed dominated the room. There was a fireplace and sitting area. A door in the room led to what Mark assumed was the adjoining bathroom. Sybil moved to the door and went in. He could hear the sound of water running.

"My room's the next one down," Edith said. "Mary's is the first door. That's why Papa wasn't too pleased."

"If he only knew," Mark said. "I don't think I'm up for any night time rendezvous for some time."

"Oh, I don't know," Edith said blushing. She whispered in his ear. "You were rather up the other day."

Mark colored beet red. Sybil came back in and informed him that he needed to take a hot bath, every evening. Since the convalescents were only allowed two baths per week as the water had to be heated and carried on the lower levels, he would take one this morning before they got started. He wasn't to get in and out of the tub on his own as he might fall and worsen his injuries. She would show Edith how to assist him.

"What! I couldn't possibly! Edith!"

"Don't be ridiculous," Sybil informed him. "I've seen thousands of men naked. Now do as your told. The water will loosen the tightened muscles. Some of the issues you are having are because the muscles weren't used while the bones were knitting."

Mark swallowed hard and started to loosen his tie. "What kind of a family am I marrying into?" he thought to himself. Sybil retrieved a towel for him to put around his waist. She and Edith left the room for a few minutes to allow him to undress in private.

They were back in a few minutes and Sybil showed Edith how to support him while he got into the hot water. To his relief Sybil allowed him to leave the towel around his waist while he was in the tub. He had to admit, he could feel some of the muscles in his back and legs loosening while he soaked in the hot water. Sybil held a towel up for him when he went to get out of the water and once it was secured, she had Edith support him while he got out and dried off.

Sybil then had him lie face down on the bed while she demonstrated where to massage the tightened muscles and then had Edith take over and practice until Sybil was satisfied with the result. She applied a liniment that smelled absolutely terrible. Sybil explained that despite the smell it would help to reduce inflammation and speed along his recovery. She then had him roll over and proceeded to repeat the process with his left hip and with his pectoral muscles. The massage Sybil applied made Mark wince more than once when she found a brittle muscle, but by the time she was finished, he had to admit he did feel looser and the pain had lessened considerably.

"I need to go and feed the baby," Sybil said. "I'll write out the routine I'm establishing for you. I'll see you at luncheon."

She left Mark and Edith alone.

"She does know what she's doing," Mark said. "I do feel a great deal better already."

"Sybil used to work with the wounded but she changed to surgical nursing as the hours are steady and she doesn't have to work shifts."

"She kept working after she was married?" Mark asked.

"Actually she started after she was married. Sybil and Tom have their own ideas about most things. They're a lot alike and they're both like Granny although neither of them will admit it," Edith said with a giggle.

Edith was sitting on the side of the bed and Mark was still laying there with only a bath towel for covering. He slid his hand up to Edith's shoulder and pulled her over for a kiss.

"Care to join me?" he asked with a small smile.

"No, you smell terrible," Edith said with a grimace. "That liniment stinks. Get dressed and we'll go for lunch. Then I'll leave you to Sybil. I have to get some work done and into the post this afternoon. Besides I keep expecting the door to burst open and Papa to come through at any moment."

She hopped off the bed and headed for the door. She looked back to see a disappointed look on his face. She went back over to him and kissed him soundly. "Maybe tonight, if you're not too tired," she whispered. Then she turned and left.

He lay back for a few minutes before he began to get dressed. These new arrangements could have their advantages after all.

Edith had collected him not twenty minutes later and stayed with him while he made his way down the stairs. Going down was even more exhausting than going up and he had to resort to going backwards after the first flight. He joined the family in the dining room for luncheon and then Sybil had taken over again and put him through a series of exercises in the therapy area. By the time two o'clock rolled around he was exhausted and in need of a break.

"I expect Tom back in about an hour," Sybil said. You can rest until then. "He'll probably want you to go and mess around with the cars or something. Tomorrow you need to start a walking routine as well, but I think that is enough for today."

Mark felt like he had been run over by a stampede of horses by the time Sybil was finished with him. The woman had a no nonsense attitude that was well hidden beneath her polite veneer and wouldn't take no for an answer. It must have been quite the scene when she faced off with her father over her marriage, he thought.

Mark wanted to go back to his room and flop on the bed, but he wasn't ready to tackle the stairs again quite so soon. He got a pen and paper from one of the men and wrote a letter to his command asking for permission to marry. Until he was back on New Zealand soil he would not released from his commission. When he was finished he put it in the pile of outgoing post and sat in one of the armchairs to read a book. He was dozing over the pages when he felt someone shake his shoulder.

"I see you've met with the force of nature that is my wife," a familiar Irish voice said. "I hope she wasn't too hard on you."

"She certainly doesn't take no for an answer," Mark replied.

"You don't know the half of it. Are you up for a walk to the garage? I've got some ale stashed down there. I want to work on the town car. The new chauffeur hasn't got the timing right. I couldn't get it up anywhere near top speed."

"Right-O," Mark said as he got up to follow Tom, "I haven't had decent ale in months."

"It's just the weak English variety, not the good stuff."

Tom found a crate for Mark to sit on by the wall of the garage while he got out the tools and started fiddling under the hood of the town car.

"This chauffeur is useless," Tom grumbled from under the bonnet.

"Edith told me you used to be the chauffeur," Mark commented.

"I was."

"And you married one of the daughters. That was a courageous move."

"Some might think so, most didn't appreciate it too well. I still don't speak to the staff and they don't speak to me."

"What's Grantham like? You seem to handle him well."

"Protective. He doesn't like the idea of his daughters being taken away from him. He's started to treat me better since I took the job in London. He's still convinced I'm some sort of revolutionary though."

"Are you?"

"No."

"Edith said you taught her to drive."

"I did."

"Was she really that bad?" Mark had almost finished his first bottle of ale and was starting to get a little sleepy sitting in the warm afternoon sun by the garage wall.

"Horrible. Still have the scar to prove it."

Tom came over and pulled up his trouser leg to reveal a two-inch scar across the front of his shin.

"Nailed me with the starter crank the first day."

"Why did you keep at it?"

"She was my fiancée's sister even though she didn't know it. She needed someone on her side. No one paid any attention to her."

"She said you were kind to her."

"I don't know if I was kind or not. I was in a bad spot, engaged to her sister but couldn't tell a soul for almost a year. We didn't tell anyone we were married for almost two months."

"Holy Christ."

"I need to start the car. Can you go push on the accelerator?"

Tom fiddled under the bonnet a bit more until he was satisfied the engine was running better and then signaled Mark to shut it off. He handed Mark another bottle of ale before they went to sit back against the wall of the garage.

"They really don't like you around here?"

"No. Have you seen the current chauffeur anywhere around since we've been out here? Pissed off the second he saw me coming."

"Hardly seems right."

"It's how it is."

"What do you really think of all the titles and the rest of it?"

"I used to think it was a pain in the ass until I realized it has its uses. Old Lady Grantham helped me get my current job. I'm actually working on something that makes a difference instead of beating my head against a brick wall. If she likes you, the rest will follow suit."

"She certainly seems to like you."

"She likes the gossip from London," Tom said with a grin. "She's not so bad once you get to know her."

Tom finished his bottle of ale then looked at Mark with a stern look.

"You going to treat Edith decent?"

"I intend to."

"Good, she deserves someone who treats her well."

"You have a soft spot for her don't you."

"She helped Sybil save my life. I owe her one. We better get back before my wife comes looking for us."

Mark stood up, straightened his tie and put on his jacket. He hadn't had this much ale in some time and the ground was swimming a bit as Tom walked him back to the house in a crooked line. If this was the weak stuff he hated to think what the man considered a decent drink.

By the time they had tea, Mark was done in for the day. Sybil insisted he take another bath and enlisted Edith to help him again. By the time they left he flopped into bed butt naked, too exhausted to put on a pair of pajamas. He didn't know he was going to withstand another three days of the Branson's visit.


	16. Stairs

Stairs

The next morning Mark woke to Edith shaking his shoulder.

"Sybil says you have to come down for breakfast. You can stay in your pajamas and robe."

"Between your sister and her husband they almost killed me yesterday," Mark grumped as he pushed his face further into the pillow. "I don't want to get up."

"Well, isn't that just too bad." He heard a voice that clearly wasn't Edith's.

The curtains snapped open and light flooded the room. A pair of folded pajamas hit the pillow beside his head.

"You have five minutes to be in the dining room," Sybil said. "If you aren't I will dress you myself and I can assure you I won't spare your modesty. Come along Edith."

He heard the door close with a decisive click. He pulled on the pajamas as fast as he could, got on his robe, ran a comb through his hair and brushed his teeth. He didn't think he had time to shave. He tightened the belt on his robe and headed out the door. He was half way down the stairs with his canes draped over his arm when Sybil opened the door on the lower landing.

"Good morning," she said sweetly. "I have a full day planned for you. Edith is busy helping my mother plan the orchard party and has some other duties to attend to. I'm afraid it will be just us today."

They entered the family dining room. Sybil moved to get herself a cup of tea and sat down.

"We serve ourselves in the mornings," she said.

Mark had a bit of a time getting a cup of tea onto the table and juggling a plate with toast and marmalade. He finally had something that looked like a reasonable breakfast at his spot.

"The sugar in the marmalade won't help your muscles," Sybil said. "I suggest you eat eggs and ham. The protein will build your strength."

Mark groaned as he got back up and got himself a plate of ham and eggs. A little spilled off the side of the plate before he made it back to the table. He finally managed to get sat down and began eating.

"I expect you to drink milk with every meal," Sybil said. "I'll let you off this morning."

"That's kind of you," he said non-committedly.

"How are you feeling this morning?" Sybil inquired.

Now that Mark actually thought about it, he realized the nagging pain in his left shoulder wasn't there.

"Some of the pain has lessened, thank you. Where's Tom today?"

"Working, the same as always. He works too much. He'll be back this afternoon. I think we have some function or other to attend this evening."

"Do you like being a political wife?" Mark inquired in an attempt to get to know Sybil a little better.

"I'm interested in the issues as well. There is always lots to discuss," she said. "It puts all my training by my governesses to use. Otherwise it would all go to waste."

"Let's go," Sybil said the minute he had finished the last bite. They went to the door of the servants' stairs. Sybil took his canes from him and put them to the side. "They can stay here for now." She opened the door and motioned for him to go up the stairs. He made it up the two flights of stairs without having to stop, when he reached for the doorknob Sybil stopped him.

"Keep going," she said.

"How far?"

"All the way to the top."

Mark looked up and swallowed.

He took hold of the railing and started up the next flight. He paused to rest at the landing. He gritted his teeth and went up the next two flights before he had to rest again. He continued until he realized he was on the last section. His eyes opened slightly. He hadn't thought he could do it. Sybil let him rest a minute before they started down. He had to stop and rest after each flight but pretty soon they were back to where they had started.

"Again," she said. "Don't worry, I'm here if you loose your balance. By Christmas you should be able to do the entire thing without any effort. You might even be able to run up."

"You're optimistic," he said.

"I prefer realistic."

By the time Mark had done the stairs again he was exhausted. Sybil collected his canes and had him go back up the stairs to his room. She put liniment on his back and left the bottle with him to put on his chest and hip before he got dressed.

"Why isn't the bed made?" she asked when she returned twenty minutes later.

"Don't the maids do it?"

"This is my room. There hasn't been a maid through that door in years. You don't have a steward now Major, I suggest you get to it."

She went to the bathroom and collected the soiled towels.

"You can take the towels down when you go for lunch. Whoever is serving will get you new ones. There are cleaning supplies in the cabinet in the washroom."

Mark was struggling his way around the bed, but finally had it made. Sybil motioned for him to take a seat across from her.

"I've made a daily schedule for the next two weeks. I'll be back up for the orchard party and I will check on your progress then. You need to record the exercises you do everyday and how many times you do them. You should try to increase the exercise repetitions at least twice a week. You should only have a massage every other day as it will allow the muscles to recover from any bruising. You can have Sunday's off. Any questions?"

Mark just shook his head. He had led men into battle but he had to admit this woman made him more than a little nervous.

"Do you know any songs?" Sybil asked.

"A few not suitable for the ears of a woman," he said. "Why?"

"It will make the stairs easier if you sing a song when you do them. It will take your mind off what your doing. Come along. We can sing the Tipperary song while you do the stairs this time. Then you can go for lunch."

By the time Sybil and Tom had left for London, Mark had managed to be able to climb the stairs between the main floor and his new sleeping quarters without having to stop. He still had to rest at least once when he climbed them all the way to the top but to his surprise he was making a slow steady improvement. The daily baths were helping the stiffness and the pain was starting to gradually lessen in a few areas. He was so tired every evening after the bath he fell into a heavy dreamless sleep almost immediately.

Edith had snuck into his room on the third night of Sybil's therapy but had been unable to wake him. After the first morning when Sybil had threatened him, he had set an alarm, made his bed and cleaned the washroom. He was ready for inspection before he made an appearance for breakfast.

The first morning Edith attempted to do the massage as Sybil had instructed her it had taken her twice as long to do the muscles of his back as it had under Sybil's guidance.

"I'm not pressing too hard am I?" Edith questioned.

"No, it feels nice," Mark said.

"This stuff smells awful," Edith said as she spread the smelly liniment on his back.

"It feels warm. I'm kind of getting used to the smell. It reminds me of sheep dip."

"I must smell hideous," Edith said.

"It does rather. Did you lock the door?"

"Yes, I don't want anyone walking in and seeing my attempts to do this," Edith said.

He rolled over. Grabbed Edith in an embrace that trapped her arms and pulled her forward.

"No, Mark!" Edith cried. Her hands were covered in the liniment and landed squarely on his naked crotch. His eyes flew open and a strangled cry erupted from his lips as he got off the bed as fast as he could and headed for the washroom with no thought of reaching for a cane. Edith followed him into the washroom to see him splashing cold water onto his private area. His face was beet red and he was repeating, "Holy Christ, Holy Christ," over and over.

"Mark, are you alright?" Edith said concern wrinkling her brow.

"_Fine" _he said in a high-pitched squeaky voice. "_I'll be right there."_

When he finally returned to the bedroom and laid down again, he said, "I won't try that again unless you've washed your hands."

Edith began working on his chest. She was trying not to laugh but the giggles kept breaking through. Finally she collapsed in a heap of laughter and had to wash her hands before she could wipe away the tears that were running down her cheeks.

"Har, Har, Very funny," he said. Which started her laughing all over again. Finally he started to laugh as well. She went around to the other side of the bed and lay down next to him. He put his arm around her and pulled her close. Her arm went around his chest.

"I'd say liniment and romantic interludes don't really mix well," Edith said in an attempt to comfort him.

"Don't tell your sister I moved that fast," he said. "She'll send instructions for me to start jogging."

They both began laughing all over again.

Two days before the orchard party Edith was heading down to check on the apple harvest just after lunch. It was a nice afternoon and Mark decided to walk down with her. Part of his therapy was to go for a daily walk on the days it wasn't raining. He was down to one cane, but still had to stop often to rest. They walked along slowly until they came to the orchard. The men had ladders erected in different areas and baskets of apples were being filled and loaded onto the back of a cart. Mark pulled an apple from a tree before he made his way to sit on an old bench.

"You wouldn't know there was a war on," he said. "Not when you look at this."

"It is lovely, isn't it?" Edith said. "I don't even notice there is anything wrong with the men anymore."

The men had worked out methods to work together and found ways around their personal issues. On closer inspection one could see the leather straps attached to the baskets so the men who were missing part of an arm or hand could lift them, but otherwise they looked like any other group of workers at harvest time.

Edith explained where the tables would be set up and the chairs. The ladders would be moved to the trees that hadn't been picked. Handbills had been circulated throughout the village and there was a great deal of chitchat around the post office of the upcoming party and apple picking. The children from the village school had prepared some skits and songs for entertainment. A rope had been hung between two poles with old sheets over for a makeshift curtain for the children.

Edith went to speak to the supervisor and then came back to take Mark's arm as they headed back to the house. She pulled his arm close to her as they walked.

"The banns only have to be read twice more," Mark commented. "I haven't received official permission to marry yet though. Did you know on the fourth reading we will be legally married, whether we have a ceremony or not?"

"I didn't know that," Edith said. "Mama and Granny can't wait to get the date. They've been making guest lists endlessly. I told them no more than a hundred guests. They're still complaining."

"How many groomsmen do I need?"

"Two, I'll only have my sisters for bridesmaids."

"Fair enough. I thought we would have more time alone with me staying in your sister's room, but it seems like we have less."

"It's not my fault you sleep like a rock," Edith said with a slight blush.

"You know this how?" he said with a grin and a raised eyebrow.

"I have my ways," Edith said.

"Ever since your sister put me on this exercise program, I fall asleep instantly. I'm too afraid of her not to do it. She informed me no maid was going to clean her room and I had better get to it."

Edith laughed at his statement. "Well, I'm not like her and the maids clean my room. It doesn't smell like liniment."

"Is that an invitation?"

"Would you like it to be?" Edith teased.

"What do you think?"

"My family is all out for the day and there is quite a nice lock on the door. Would you like to see it?"

"Love to," he said quickening his pace.

When they got to the servant's stairs they ran into Anna coming down the stairs.

"Your room is finished Lady Edith," she said. "We've left clean sheets for you Major Goward. You're looking much better, Sir."

"Thank you, Anna," Edith said. "We're just going up. Major Goward needs to rest for a bit."

"Of course, Lady Edith," Anna said with a knowing smirk as she moved to the side so Mark could pass.

"Thank you," he said.

They made it to the hall and moved down as far as Edith's room. She looked every which way to see if anyone was watching before she opened the door and pulled him in. Mark lost his balance slightly as he tumbled in the door. Edith steadied him so he wouldn't fall over and closed the door quickly. She turned the key in the lock and left it in the door. She took her hat and gloves off and threw them in the corner. He had already removed his hat and jacket and was working on his tie. Edith was watching him and at the same time shedding her cloths. When she got as far as her corset he reached over and started unhooking it for her. Her fingers went to the buttons of his shirt and then lower. He dropped his shirt on the floor and finished undressing her before he stepped back to sit on the bed and kick off the remnants of his clothing.

She moved forward to stand between his legs. He wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face against her. Her arms moved around his shoulders and she laid her cheek on the top of his hair.

"I don't know how much I'll be able to manage," he said against her. "I'd like to do more but it is going to take some creativity."

"What can't you do?" Edith said into his hair.

He tilted his face up to her for a kiss. She placed her hands on either side of his face and then returned them to his shoulders when the kiss ended.

"Nothing on my knees and not too much weight on my hip region. I want our first time together to be satisfying for you, Edith, not an exercise in frustration."

"The other day was lovely," Edith said tightening her arms around him slightly. "I just want to be with _you. _The how isn't so important."

He had to use one hand to support himself as he moved between the sheets and lay down. He still had ahold of her one hand and guided her down beside him. He was lying on his side with his head propped on one elbow and tracing the lines of her face with his fingers.

"You're so very beautiful," he murmured before he kissed her again. They took their time kissing and touching each other. She knew his body well from helping him in and out of the tub and the massages. Now she allowed her self to explore the texture of his skin in different areas she had longed to touch and savored the feeling of his chest hair against her hands and her bare skin. He trailed kisses over her torso and abdomen. His finger made slow circles around the opening to her vagina and slipped his fingers back and forth in a maddeningly slow rhythm.

Edith's heart was pounding and she was going crazy with the sensations that were coursing through her. When she couldn't take it any longer she snuggled even closer to him. He leaned over her slightly and kissed her. His tongue in her mouth imitated of the intimate motions they both craved.

Mark pulled back and looked at her. His hands were shaking a bit.

"What's the matter," Edith whispered to him.

"I want our first time to be so perfect, everything's so close and yet so far at the same time."

"Don't worry, everything to this point has been lovely."

Edith put both her legs over his thighs and squirmed closer. With a small amount of shifting he was able to enter her. He was watching her face and saw he teeth bite her bottom lip as he moved. He used his free hand to life her legs off him and keep the weight off his injuries. He wasn't able to move at a fast pace, but he was entranced with being sheathed in her warmth. Edith's pleasure was building and she was enjoying every movement and second of their time together. She had one hand on his chest and was clutching at him as her body contracted in her release. She could feel him coming inside her as his body convulsed.

"Was that alright?" she questioned, looking into his face. "You're alright aren't you?"

"I'm better than alright," he said with a slow smile. "Thank you, that was lovely."

He kissed her softly on the lips and pulled her close. They allowed themselves to doze off only to be woken an hour later by a knocking at the door.

"Edith, are you in there?" Mary called. "Papa's looking for Mark and nobody can find him. Edith? Well, I don't know where they've gotten off to. The town car is still in the garage." They could hear through the door. "Well, of course he's not in her room Papa, the man can barely walk. I'll go down and get the key if you're so concerned. Honestly, they've most likely gone out in the gardens somewhere and he's stuck there or something. You would think everyman under this roof is up to no good to listen to…." Mary's voiced faded off down the hall.

Edith had taken a handful of the covers and pressed them against her mouth to keep from giggling. Mark was biting his lip to keep from laughing.

"What will we tell them?" Edith said her eyes suddenly going round. She sat up with a look of panic on her face.

"We'll tell them you were seeing to my therapy," he said. Edith swatted him before she headed into her washroom to take a bath. By the time she came back, Mark was gone and the bed was perfectly made as though he had never been there. She got dressed and headed out of her room to overhear Mark speaking to her father downstairs.

"I've been climbing stairs," he said, "and trying different therapies all afternoon. You know its all a matter of experimentation." He looked up from the great hall to see Edith looking down at him with a smile. He winked at her before he headed off to another part of the house.

Mary came to stand beside Edith at the railing.

"Therapy?" Mary said with one raised eyebrow.

Edith put a hand to her mouth and giggled before she turned to follow her sister down the hall.


	17. Advice

Advice

The day of the orchard party turned out to be a warm, clear fall day. The party was scheduled to begin at one. Everyone began to make their way to the apple orchard just after luncheon. The estate workers were standing by to help push wheel chairs, or move ladders as needed. Sybil and Tom had arrived the night before and Isobel Crawley had taken the afternoon off from the village hospital to attend. Edith was terribly nervous that the party would go well and was dashing about double-checking her list to make sure the estate staff and Mrs. Hughes had everything in order. The villagers began arriving and Edith soon realized her fears were for nothing.

Picnic blankets were spread on the ground and the orchard was alive with the sounds of children laughing as they ran about playing tag and people filling the baskets they had brought. Lady Violet and Lady Cora were seated under a small awning with Sybil's son playing on a blanket near their feet. Lord Grantham was busy circulating and welcoming people to the party. Mark came to stand beside Edith.

"Are you feeling less nervous now?" he asked. "Everything is going just as you planned."

"I'm much better, thank you," Edith said sliding her arm through his.

John Biggs, the first man Edith had hired approached them to introduce his fiancée to Edith.

"It's such a pleasure to meet you, Lady Edith. John's told me so much about you," she said. "He's always saying you gave him a chance when no one else would."

"How kind of you to say," Edith replied. "Not many men want to work for a woman. Your fiancée has done an exceptional job."

A few other of the men brought their sweethearts to meet Lady Edith and the comments Edith received all ran along the same lines.

"You certainly have their loyalty," Mark commented. "There are officers who would envy you."

So many of the villagers stopped by to congratulate Lady Edith on her engagement she had little time for much else. Mark noticed that a number of the officers had approached the estate workers who had injuries similar to their own. They were actively involved in conversations regarding how the men had managed to overcome some of the obstacles they faced.

When Mark couldn't stand any longer they found a seat to the side of the family. At one point Sybil and Tom disappeared for a time, only to show up a while later hand in hand. Mark wished he could steal Edith away for an hour or two, but this was her day and she was glowing. About an hour and half into the party, the baskets were full and Lord Grantham moved to the small makeshift stage. He thanked everyone for coming. Everyone clapped when he congratulated Lady Edith and Lady Cora for organizing the event. The children from the village school performed their skits and recited poems. Once the children were finished. Musicians from the village got out their instruments and there was dancing on the grass. Many of the officers were tired out from the afternoon and after thanking Lady Edith and Lord Grantham for the afternoon's activities headed back to the house.

"I wish I could dance with you," Mark commented as he watched the country dancing in front of them.

Edith looked at him admiringly and slid her hand into his.

"Soon, not today, but soon."

The party broke up in the late afternoon and everyone headed back to the house.

"It was a lovely afternoon, Edith," her mother said. "I'm very glad you had the idea."

Her father and the other family members complimented her as well. Edith was a bit embarrassed by all the praise and by the time she had returned to the house she was worn out.

* * *

The next afternoon Edith had wanted to talk to Sybil privately. There was no way she could ever discuss parts of her personal life with Mary or her mother. Secretly Edith thought that Mary most likely knew even less than herself, despite the Kamal Pamuk incident. She invited Sybil to go out on the grounds for a walk with her. Sybil had the baby in a pram and they strolled along one of the lanes that meandered through the estate. Edith was fidgety and Sybil waited until they were well away from the house before she said anything. The baby fell asleep almost instantly in the fresh autumn air.

"How are things with you, Edith? Is everything going well with your engagement?"

"Yes...no...can we sit?" Edith asked her.

"What's wrong?"

"Mark's so … hesitant with personal things," Edith finally said. "I practically had to throw myself at him at first. He's awfully nice but he has no confidence especially with personal matters. I don't know what to do."

"His reaction isn't unusual, especially with the extent of his injuries," Sybil said. "When they're in the hospital, they watch the nurses for any sign of revulsion. It takes everything you have at times to not react to what you see. No matter how ill they are, they're still men."

Edith nodded and twisted her hands in her lap.

"You do realize he will never fully recover." Sybil said. "He's always going to have a slight limp on the left and he'll most likely never be able to run beyond a few paces. The stronger he is the better he will be able to compensate and the better his confidence will be."

"I suppose you're right."

"Do you love him?"

Edith nodded.

"Then tell him as often as you can and show him you admire him," Sybil said. "It may be the best medicine he can have. Men are funny that way."

"I'm not quite sure… well that is… I mean to say," Edith didn't know how to ask her sister for sexual advice. "How?" she finally blurted out. "He can't have relations the normal way. At least not right now."

Sybil got a small smile on her face when she realized what her sister was trying to ask her. She was somewhat embarrassed as well to be having this conversation and a blush stole up her face.

"Take charge," Sybil said. She leaned close to Edith and whispered even though there was no one within sight. "Go on top and do the work."

"Oh," Edith said, her eyes wide and hand covering her mouth.

"There are other ways too, but I've never tried it. I've heard about it at work," Sybil whispered.

"Other ways?" Edith asked. She was blushing so profusely she was overheating.

"It involves kissing the other person, you know, _there_!"

"Oh my!" Edith started fanning herself with her hand.

"Settle down, Edith. You wanted to know, so I've told you." Sybil said, still whispering.

They got up and started walking back towards the house.

"I accidentally got that liniment on his personal parts the other day," Edith told Sybil with a giggle.

"You didn't," Sybil said her eyes round!

"He jumped up so fast. You should have seen the look on his face."

The women were laughing over the incident while they walked back to the house.

"Thank you, Sybil, for being so understanding," Edith said.

"If you can't ask your sister, who can you ask?" Sybil said.

Mark and Tom had come out to meet them when they saw the women approaching. Edith though how attractive they both looked. Mark had a classic handsomeness that stole her breath away. Tom's fair hair and complexion made him so striking he was almost pretty.

"Ask about what?" Tom asked as they arrived and he gave Sybil a peck on the cheek.

"About the things that make the world tick," Sybil replied with a blush.

Edith just blushed and went to Mark to kiss him on the cheek as well. Sybil had told her to show him she loved him at every chance she had and she resolved to do just that.

* * *

Sybil arranged a meeting with Mark and the onsite therapist before she left for London. The therapist reviewed Mark's progress and added some new exercises to his routine. He had done so well building his strength with the stair climbing and his exercise routine, it was decided he could try using just one cane and stop using one completely by the end of October. Sybil inquired if bicycle riding would be an appropriate therapy and the therapist agreed as long as Mark took short rides at first and avoided riding anywhere too bumpy or hilly.

Mark had balked a bit at the thought of bouncing around on a bicycle, but had been assured the activity would help him build his leg strength quickly. It was decided that he should still avoid the main staircase and stick to the narrower ones with more support. As well, he could take baths on his own as long as he was careful getting in and out of the tub.

Edith had been out all day driving one of the lorries for the harvest. When she returned to the house that evening she was surprised to find Mark waiting for her with just one cane.

"I'm down to one cane," he proudly informed her. "And I can take a bath on my own."

"Oh," Edith said a little disappointed. She rather enjoyed looking at his naked body when she helped him in and out of the tub every evening.

At the sight of her downcast expression, Mark's excitement was fading.

"I thought you'd be happy. You don't have to treat me like a baby anymore."

Sybil's advice to reassure Mark that she admired him rattled around inside Edith's head. She took a small hesitant step closer to him so she could whisper in his ear, "I was rather enjoying the opportunity to admire your body on a daily basis."

"Oh!" His eyes opened slightly wider and his face colored.

"As soon as we're married, you can admire it all you like," he murmured back as he placed a kiss on her cheek.

Two weeks later Mark still had not heard back from his command regarding his permission to marry and made a series of phone calls to see what he could find out. Then banns were completed and Edith's family was pressing for a date. After four phone calls he was finally able to contact a ranking officer above himself and received verbal permission. The papers would be sent out that afternoon and should be in his possession within a week. A few days after the locked door incident Lord Grantham had gotten him alone and informed him that if they hadn't already been to see the Reverend Travis he would have set the dogs on him. Edith's father was deliberately making it difficult for them to spend time alone and Mark couldn't get the wedding over soon enough.

Lady Cora was overjoyed that the final obstacle to the marriage had been resolved and planning began in earnest. Edith was in a flap with the preparations. Harvest was still going on and she had a great deal of material to get through for her course. She didn't want to get married during the last week of October, as that was Sybil's wedding anniversary and the anniversary of Bill's death, although the latter she kept to herself. It was finally decided they would get married during the first week of November.

"I would rather just go to the church with the family and get married tomorrow," Mark complained. "I've had enough of having you sleep on the other side of a wall."

"Mother and Father would never allow it," Edith said. "Sybil's marriage almost created a huge scandal if Granny and Aunt Rosamund hadn't covered up the facts. We'll just have to grin and bear it."

"Three weeks?" Mark said raising one eyebrow.

"Three weeks for you to build up your strength," Edith replied.

"For?"

"So you can dance with me at out wedding amongst other things," Edith said feigning innocence.


	18. Riding

Riding

Gifts began pouring in once the invitations were sent out. Edith had finally relented on the guest list and her mother had invited well over a hundred guests. Mark had no family in England to invite and sent invitations to only a few fellow officers in his regiment. He doubted any of them would be able to attend but wanted to wait until he had a reply to select a best man. In this sea of English accents he would like at least one of his own countrymen with him.

Edith was getting more and more frustrated. Her father hadn't fallen for Mark's story about being busy with therapy and the few times Mark had accompanied her on an activity on the home farm, Lord Grantham had made it a point to ask when they would be back and been waiting for them when they returned. Mark's temper had almost gotten the better of him, but he was literally a guest in the man's home and in view of his future position in the family he put up with it for Edith's sake.

Edith was still performing the massage therapy every other morning. When her father had stopped them and protested, Mark had enough. He turned as fast as he was able and left Edith and her father standing in the hallway.

"Oh, Papa, how could you?" Edith said. She looked over the rail to the grand hall to see her fiancé making his way out the front door that closed a moment later with a loud bang. "We're not children. You're treating us like a pair of naughty youngsters."

"I want the man to treat you with respect."

"He does. He's very good to me. Mark's trying so hard to please you. Why can't you see it?"

"I see that he almost ruined your reputation."

"How Papa? By asking me to marry him and buying me a ring? He's allowing this ridiculous wedding when its not what either of us wants. It's no wonder Sybil and Tom told you after the fact. It makes me wish we had insisted on a small wedding. We would be married by now an we wouldn't be having this conversation." Edith finished her tirade and looked about nervously. She wanted to flee and was starting to feel ill from challenging her father.

"Oh very well," her father said. "Promise me you will be more careful in future. I don't want to see you hurt."

"We're adults Papa, who are getting married in a few weeks. Mark isn't trying to hurt me. He loves me. Please try to see that."

Edith went and got her jacket and headed outside. She had no idea where to look for Mark and asked one of the passing staff if they had seen which way Mark went. The man pointed in the direction of the stables and out buildings. It took Edith twenty minutes to find him. Mark had shed his uniform jacket, shirt and hat and was in his undershirt brushing down one of the mares in the corridor of the stables. Edith couldn't read the expression on his face and went to sit on a box of tack near where Mark was working. He continued brushing and not saying a word, then took some tools and checked the horse's hooves before he spoke to her.

"I'm good with horses," he said. "That's why I'm a cavalry officer. I like the way they move." He took out a different currycomb and started working on the mane. "I won't be treated like a naughty schoolboy, Edith. I think I should go and stay elsewhere until the wedding."

"No," Edith said. "I had it out with him. It's going to stop. We only have two more weeks and then it's done."

"You might be able to live under their control, but I can't."

"Mark, what are you saying? Have you changed your mind?"

"I haven't changed my mind. I want to marry you and take you home with me. What I'm saying is I need to find the part of me I lost on that battle field."

He was finished grooming the mare and moved to get a saddle and bridle.

"Mark, you can't!" Edith stood and put a hand on his arm.

"I can't live in fear," he said shaking her hand off and finishing with the tack.

He led the mare outside to a mounting block, and signaled one of the boys working in the stable to hold the mare while he mounted. He gripped a fistful of the mane in his left hand, gritted his teeth and swung his leg over the horse's back. He was still wearing his dress shoes instead of riding boots, but was undeterred.

"Mark, you can't! Wait!" Edith called to him desperately. "At least wait until I can change and go with you."

Mark didn't even glance at her, just picked up the reins and walked the mare out of the cobbled yard. When he reached the dirt lane he kicked the mare into a canter and headed off.

Edith was panicking.

"Saddle my horse!" she commanded the stable boy who had been holding Mark's mount. She gathered her skirt into a ball and ran back to the house as fast as she could. "What if he falls?" she thought. "Or jars himself? All of the progress he has made could be undone in seconds." She tore up the stairs, donned a pair of pants she used for working in the fields, pulled on her riding boots and ran back down the stairs.

"Edith what on earth is going on?" her mother called to her.

"I have to find him," Edith called back as she ran across the lawn towards the stable.

Edith's horse was saddled when she arrived and Lynch was standing by with a horse saddled to accompany her.

"I'm going alone," she informed him.

"Milady, your father wouldn't approve."

"I don't care what my father approves of at this moment," Edith replied. Right now she was cursing that she only knew how to ride sidesaddle, astride would have made so much more sense. She moved her mare in the same direction she had seen Mark go and put her into a canter. When she came to a fork in the lane she slowed her mount to a walk and decided to try the direction of the fields. Mark had been with her to check the crops a number of times and Edith hoped he had taken a track he might recognize. She was past the first collection of fields without any sign of him. She passed through a break in the thicket that separated the vegetable and grain fields from the hayfield. In the distance she could see a man on horseback talking to one of the men loading hay onto a cart. Edith breathed a sigh of relief and felt the panic and tension drain out of her. She headed his way at a slow trot.

"Lady Edith," the man supervising the crew tipped his hat to her before he went back to his work.

Edith nodded coolly to the man and looked at Mark. Her face betrayed her annoyance.

"It looks like they should have this field in by the end of the day," Mark said. "It will probably rain tomorrow. Where are you thinking of pasturing the cattle for the winter?"

They had turned their horses and were walking them away from the men back towards the lane.

"Mark Goward, you are not getting off that easy," Edith said. "You nearly scared me to death. What do you think you were doing?"

"Going for a ride, just like I have nearly every day of my life until I got hurt. Don't fret Edith. I'm fine. We should start doing this more often."

Edith looked at him with her mouth open. She didn't know what to say.

"When we get back to the house, do you think you could rub my shoulder for me. It's a little sore. Your father can even watch if it makes him happy, although that liniment is repulsive stuff. It might do him some good."

Edith snapped her mouth shut and kicked her mare into a gallop leaving him behind.

"Hey," he called after her. "What's your rush?"

Mark made it back to the stables just after Edith. He kick his feet free of the stirrups and slid off the horse keeping ahold of the saddle to keep from dropping too fast. One of the stable boys came out of the stable and took his mount. Edith was standing by the door waiting for him. He made his way over to her and pulled her into his embrace.

"Mark someone will see," Edith said, looking both ways. Her anger had dissipated on the ride back.

"I don't care," he replied. He lowered his head and kissed her thoroughly. When he was done he released her and headed inside to find his things. When he came out of the stable he was carrying his cane in his hand and not using it.

"Why aren't you using your cane?" Edith said.

"I was finished with it in a few days anyway. I'd rather go without." He took her hand as they walked back towards the house.

"Do I need to kick you in the shins?" Edith asked.

"Whatever for?"

"You said if you got anymore stupid ideas, I should kick you in the shins," Edith said. She was looking at the ground. She wasn't used to this more confident version of Mark and it was unsettling her.

"No, I think I'm fine. Thank you for remembering though. I'm going to take a bath when I get back. Would you mind giving me a massage when I'm done. I'm going to pay for riding after not being on a horse in so long."

"If you like," Edith said. "You aren't going to move out are you?"

"No, but I'm not going to sneak around either. The banns are read. Legally we are man and wife. We won't share a room until we've gone through with this ridiculous wedding to uphold propriety, but we need to set some ground rules with your family."

Edith broke out into a smile. She pulled his arm tight against her and looked up at him adoringly.

"I've found out about something I wanted to try," she said. Her eyes shifted every which way and she put her free hand over her mouth. "It's rather naughty."

"Is it now," he said. "You've peaked my interest."

"We could try it after your massage. We just won't use liniment."

"That would be a good thing," he said starting to chuckle.

They had made it back to the house. Lady Cora was waiting for them when they entered.

"Is everything alright?" she asked. "You left in such a hurry, Edith. I was worried."

"Everything is fine, Lady Cora," Mark said. "I took one of the horses for a ride. Edith was a little shocked. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take care of a few aches and pains before the ride catches up with me."

"Yes, of course," Lady Cora said. After Mark had left them she turned to Edith. "Edith you look a fright, what happened?"

"I think Mark's better."

"What do you mean? He's still limping."

"Not that, his body still has to get stronger. He is just different somehow, more in control."

"He did seem different."

"I'm going to go see if Mark is finished his bath and rub out his sore muscles."

"Edith, your father won't like you spending that much time alone with Mark this close before the wedding."

"Mark doesn't care if Papa likes it and you know I don't think I do anymore either," Edith said getting a dreamy smile on her face.

"Edith! What's gotten into you?" her mother said.

"I've got something I should have had a long time ago, Mama. Confidence," Edith said before she climbed the stairs, entered her fiancés bedroom and locked the door.


	19. Trains

_Events in this chapter are based on the Bere Ferres rail accident, which occurred September 24, 1917. I am taking artistic license with the date and moving it one month later. _

Trains

"Edith is that you?" Mark called from the washroom.

"Yes."

"I've been laying here thinking about where we should live after we are married," he said. "I'd like to head back to New Zealand but I think you should finish your studies."

Edith didn't have time to reply when there was a knock on the door. She opened the door to see her father standing there.

"I'd like to have a word with Mark," he said.

Edith stood back so he could enter.

"Mark, my father is here and wants to speak to you. I'm going to go get changed. I'm covered in dust."

"That's fine. I'll be right out."

Lord Grantham idled uneasily around the room until Mark emerged from the bathroom wrapped in a robe. The two men looked at each other in a duel of wills until Mark finally spoke.

"Won't you sit down, Lord Grantham? I was hoping to have a chance to speak to you later."

"I prefer to stand."

"Well, I prefer to sit," Mark said not taking any of Lord Grantham's guff.

They each took a seat. Mark leaned back in his chair. His casual posture was in stark contrast to the rigid expression on his face. His demeanor was that of someone who is used to being in charge.

"I think we should get a few things straight," Lord Grantham said.

"I couldn't agree more," Mark replied. "I'm grateful that you have allowed me to stay here, but know this. Edith and I are going through with this overblown wedding ceremony to please you and your family. The banns have already been completed and legally we are married. I would be perfectly happy to forget the entire thing and go to the vicar this afternoon for the ceremony."

It wasn't often Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham was speechless, but this was one of them.

"To preserve your sense of propriety I am planning to go down to Plymouth. I've received word that some of the men from my home parish will be arriving day after tomorrow. I'll travel up to Salisbury with them then spend some time in London. I'll be gone a week to ten days and be back well before the wedding," Mark said. "I would appreciate your permission for your daughter and I to remain here after the ceremony. If that is not acceptable we will take accommodation elsewhere. Edith has worked too hard on her studies and accomplished too much to abandon them now. She can best do that by remaining here."

"Yes, well umm. Edith's studies are important. We can discuss Edith's and your accommodation in this house for after the wedding when Edith returns." Lord Grantham said. Mark had changed. The man was self-assured and knew what he wanted. Robert Crawley was used to people bending easily to his will. The only thorn in his side was his youngest daughter and her husband. Now he could see this man could be an even bigger one.

"I appreciate that. She should only be a few more minutes. You certainly have a well stocked stable," Mark commented. "The mount I had today was a fine specimen."

"Do you ride regularly?"

"I'll need to get back to it, now that I am on the mend. The terrain back home isn't suited to motor vehicles. Most of my business on the station is conducted on horseback. Perhaps we could go out riding once I have a new pair of riding boots? I would like to see more of the estate by horseback."

"When you are outfitted, let me know and we can arrange something."

There was a soft knock on the door and Edith came into the room. She had taken a quick bath and changed back into a blouse and skirt.

"We were just discussing your accommodation after the wedding," her father said. "Mark pointed out that it would be most advantageous for your studies if you remain here until they are completed. You may select any of the rooms you choose. Arrange it with your mother and Mrs. Hughes when you have the time."

"Thank you, Papa. I would like to see the projects I have started through," Edith said.

Her father rose and kissed her on the temple.

"Carry on then, don't let me keep you from your work," he said before he made a hasty retreat.

"What did you say to him?" Edith asked slightly shocked.

"Not much," Mark said. He rose and went to lock the door. "I told him I'm going to Plymouth then London for ten days or so. I'll leave the day after tomorrow." He moved over to the bed and sat on the side.

"Whatever for?" Edith said, starting to loose some of her earlier confidence.

"There are some troop ships arriving from New Zealand with some men I know onboard. I'll travel the first leg of the journey with them. Then I'll go to London. I need a new uniform for the wedding. Mine is getting rather tatty. My riding boots were destroyed. I'll have a pair made, I'd like to do more riding while I'm here."

Edith pushed on Mark's shoulder to get him to lie down and started working out the kinks in his back.

"It seems like an awfully long time."

"Ouch!" he said when she hit a particularly soar spot. "It will give me and your father some distance before the wedding and it will take temptation out of the way." Mark was quiet for a few minutes. "Have I ever mentioned how much I appreciate you doing this? It's not many women who would do it."

"Mark you're not marrying me out of gratitude are you or to get a nursemaid?"

"No," he said turning over and sitting up. "I'm not marrying you for any of those reasons." He pulled Edith down onto the bed beside him. "I'm marrying you because you are the best woman for me. I love you. Why can't you see that?"

Edith nodded slowly and pushed him back to start working on his chest.

"You said you wanted to show me something "naughty". What is it?" he asked.

Edith leaned forward gave him a quick kiss him on the lips. "Promise not to laugh?"

His fingers were opening the buttons of her cloths.

"Depends what it is. It might tickle."

"It might. Close your eyes," she said. Edith went and closed the curtains on the windows even though there was absolutely no way anyone could see them. She removed her clothing as Mark had already undone most of it. She went back and curled on the empty side of the bed. She was incredibly nervous about what she was about to do and had no idea what his reaction would be.

"Are your eyes closed?" she asked.

"Yes, what is it? Why are you so embarrassed?"

"Because of this." She lowered her head and placed a kiss on the head of his penis. It wasn't so bad she thought. The skin had a satiny texture that was smooth against her lips. She did it again. On the third kiss she left her lips in place a little longer. By the fourth he was fully erect and she placed a small sucking kiss directly on the tip.

"What do you think?" she asked him. Mark's eyes were open and he was watching her.

"_More!_" he managed to squeak out in a strangled voice.

Edith returned to what she had been doing and gained confidence in her actions as Mark began touching her anywhere he could reach and rubbing one hand through her hair. His reaction to her experimenting was exciting her. She slid his length deep into her mouth and slowly slid it up the entire length. As she release her lips from his swollen penis he let out a small groan.

She straddled him and crawled forward to kiss him on the mouth.

"Why did you stop?" he mumbled against her mouth. He was kissing her wildly and attempting to touch her everywhere at once.

"Because of this," she whispered back. She pushed herself back until she felt his hardened penis pressing against her. She wiggled until she found exactly the right spot and lowered herself onto him.

"Holy lord!" he exclaimed as his eyes flew open. He grabbed her hips and guided her movements. Edith was in a bit of frenzy herself at trying out so many new things at once. His hands started roaming over her body as she pushed herself up to a more upright position on top of him. Her hands were playing over his chest and abdomen in random patterns. He had his eyes tightly squeezed shut and was fighting for control. He slid his thumb against her nub, while his other hand rubbed one nipple. It was all it took to push her over the edge. He let go as soon as he felt her body start to contract and came with her.

Edith curled herself forward onto Mark's chest being careful not to put too much weight on him. His arms were wrapped around her and he placed a kiss in her hair.

"Where did you? I mean. How? That was incredible," he finally managed to blurt out.

"I'm glad you liked it," Edith said as she snuggled against him for a minute. "Now I really do have to get some work done and I have a chapter to read for one of my courses. I best get to it."

"Not until you tell me where you learned to do that. I bloody more than liked it," Mark said.

"It's something I've been thinking about for a while, but was too embarrassed to try," she said snuggling her face into his chest in embarrassment. "Look at the time. I really have to go if I'm going to get anything done today."

Edith was gone in a few minutes. Mark lay back and thought about the events of the afternoon for a minute or two. His previous experience had been very limited. His first fiancée had seemed rather disinterested and wanted everything over as quickly possible and had only consented right before he left for the war. He had been frustrated beyond belief. Edith on the other hand had seemed to enjoy being with him but nothing had prepared him for what had just happened. He took the smelly liniment and rubbed it on his torso and legs. He was going to pay for the events of the day in sore muscles he was sure, but it was worth it.

"Where's Mark?" Mary asked the next day at dinner.

"He's gone to meet some incoming troops then to London. He'll be back in ten days or so," Edith replied.

"Oh. Whatever for?"

"He wanted to see some men he knows and obtain a new uniform for the wedding," Edith said pushing her food around on her plate.

Once everyone had retired for the evening Mary knocked on Edith's door and entered when she heard a faint, "Come in." Mary entered to see Edith hastily wiping her eyes and hiding her hanky in her vanity.

"What's wrong, Edith? You seem so down. Are you missing Mark?"

"That's part of it," Edith said.

"And what's the other part?" Mary was concerned, as she hadn't seen Edith this down since she had mourned Bill and didn't want her sister going through anything like that again in the near future.

"I'm just so worried. What if I get to his home and I'm not what he wanted. He's changed. He's more… I don't know how to describe it. He's so sure of himself. He's been exercising all the time. He hardly stops for meals."

"It sounds to me that his health is starting to come back at last. He was terribly ill when you first met him. You have to expect some changes."

"I suppose you're right."

"You haven't changed your mind have you?"

"No," Edith said suddenly looking aghast. "I would never change my mind. I just hope he doesn't wake up one day and regret that he married me."

"Have you told him this?" Mary questioned gently. "I hardly think he will regret marrying you after everything you've been through already. Try and get some rest he'll be back in a few days and all of this will seem like nothing."

"It's not nothing," Edith said. "Why does he want me, of all people? He could have anyone he wants."

"Obviously not _anyone_," Mary said. "He is quite attractive, but he's chosen you. Just talk to him when he returns and you will see all your worrying has been for nothing."

Edith tried to keep herself busy and keep her mind off Mark's absence. She thought he was being stubborn and pushing himself by going off for ten days on his own but he wouldn't listen.

"I can do the exercises just as well on my own as here," he had said. "I'll miss you, but your father and I need some distance. When I get back, we'll get married and the problem will be solved."

On the third morning of Mark's absence Edith arrived for breakfast to a solemn faced Lord Grantham and worried looks on her mother and sister's faces.

"What's happened," Edith said immediately.

"Now Edith, don't panic," her mother said. "Your father will make some calls and find out what he can."

"What is it? Tell me!" Edith could feel the panic building. It was almost two years to the day that she had received word of Bill's death.

"There was an accident at Bere Ferres. Nine soldiers from New Zealand that had just docked in Plymouth were killed on the tracks. More are in hospital. The were hit by the oncoming express train."

"Noooo!" Edith said. It was more wail than denial. Her face had turned whiter than linen and dropped into a chair. Her eyes were vacant and she was shaking like a leaf.

"We don't even know for sure if he was on the train," Mary said trying to comfort her. "Try not to jump to conclusions. Papa will make some calls and see what he can find out."

Edith allowed her mother and sister to lead her from the room. They got her back into her nightdress and into bed. Edith was shaking so hard, Mary rang for a hot water bottle and placed a shawl around her shoulders.

Lady Cora tried to insist Edith eat something but had no luck. That afternoon Lord Grantham came up to tell them he had not been able to find out anything and the names of the dead had not been released yet. He did find out another man had died in hospital bringing the death toll to ten.

Edith covered her face with her hands and began sobbing hysterically.

"Why did I listen? We would have been married by now. He would have never left. Why? Why? Why?"

"Edith you have to listen to me," Mary said. "We don't know anything for sure. Mark could walk through the front door any minute. You don't want him to see you like this."

"Every man I love dies," Edith wailed.

Lord Grantham went down to send the chauffeur for Dr. Clarkson. At the end of the second day there had still be no word from Mark and Lord Grantham had not been able to find out any news. Dr. Clarkson had prescribed a sleeping powder for Edith. She was refusing to eat and sat staring at the window watching the droplets or rain trickle down the glass.

"He's not at the hotel he is supposed to be staying at in London," Lord Grantham told Lady Cora. "He never checked in."

"Oh, Robert. You don't think?" Lady Cora replied.

"No, I don't. He'll show up and when he does I'll give him a piece of my mind."

"We have to do something," Lady Cora said later that day. "O'Brien get Lady Edith's clothing ready. We are taking her out."

"Where are we going to take her, Mama?" Mary asked.

"Away from here, away from her grief. I could just throttle that man for not sending a telegram to say he is alright."

"We don't know the circumstances. Perhaps there is something preventing him," Mary said.

Once Edith was dressed they went into Ripon. Edith was not talking or responding but did eat something at the teashop they went to.

Three days after the train accident the names of the dead were published in the paper. Mark's name was not among them. Edith came out of her reverie but remained despondent. She threw herself into her studies and barely spoke to anyone. She would not enter the library where the wedding gifts were displayed.

Mark had been gone nine days when a hired car pulled up to the door in the evening and the maids began carrying in packages. Mark came wandering in behind the maids and headed for the stairs. Lord Grantham came out of the library and confronted him the second he was informed that Major Goward had returned.

"Why didn't you send any word?" Lord Grantham demanded. "Edith has been worried sick. She thought the worst. We all did."

"Send word about what? I went and met some friends then went to London. Exactly what I said I was going to do."

"After the accident in Bere Ferres. We didn't hear from you. It's been all over the papers."

"Oh that! Quite frightful. Took forever to sort things out. Nothing worse than a battle field though."

"You didn't think to call or contact us that you were alright?"

"Why would I? I've been through at least a hundred battles and watched hundreds of men die. Why would this be any different?"

"Because this happened on home ground."

"It's all home ground to someone."

Edith had heard Mark's voice and came out on the landing. She tore down the stairs when she saw it was him and launched herself into his arms. She was sobbing so hard she couldn't speak. Mark was flabbergasted by the commotion his return was creating and hadn't been prepared to deal with a distraught Edith.

"How could you? How could you?" she was blubbering against his chest.

"How could I what? Edith, get ahold of yourself."

"There was no word and you weren't at your hotel."

"I changed hotels at the last moment. They were overbooked. I don't understand what all this commotion is about."

They were getting curious looks from the convalescing officers. Lord Grantham motioned for them to follow him into the library.

"Edith has been quite distraught when we had no word from you," Lord Grantham informed him. "You've put her in a difficult situation by not calling or sending word."

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was on such a short leash," Mark said.

"Is it too much to ask for you to extend my daughter some consideration," Lord Grantham snapped.

Edith was attempting to wipe her eyes and the building tension between the two men was threatening to set her off again. She had taken a seat on one of the sofas and was twisting her hanky between wiping away tears.

"I thought I was showing consideration by absenting myself from a difficult situation," Mark said. He moved to sit beside Edith and put an arm around her to rub her shoulder. He still didn't see what all the fuss was about, but she definitely needed a calming influence. "Perhaps I can speak to my fiancée alone."

"I'm not done with you, young man."

"I need to speak with Edith and you aren't helping matters," Mark snapped back.

"Stop it. Just stop it, both of you," Edith spit out and suddenly stood up. "Mark you've worried me terribly for nothing. It was inconsiderate and cruel. I'm going up to my room. I'll speak to you in the morning."

"Edith, stop this nonsense," Mark called after her. She kept walking and headed up the stairs.

"I suggest you go after her and make things right with my daughter," Lord Grantham said making the suggestion sound more like a command.

Mark turned back to look at Lord Gratham with a hostile look.

"I can't win for trying with you lot. What do you want from me?"

"Respect for my household, which you obviously lack!" Lord Grantham stated before he stormed out of the room.


	20. Understanding

Understanding

Mark went to his room, chucked his hat on the girly vanity, pulled off his tie and dropped his jacket and overcoat on the bed. He paced back and forth for a bit to allow his temper to calm down. He hadn't been prepared for the scene he had walked into. He still didn't see why they would have all jumped to the wrong conclusion so quickly. He was concerned for Edith. She was obviously upset and he needed to talk to her.

He went down the hall to knock on her door. There was no answer. He tried the handle and found the door was locked.

"Edith, open this door and let me in. We aren't getting anywhere this way." Still nothing. "Edith, please talk to me."

Finally, he heard the lock click and the door opened. Edith had her arms wrapped around her waist and had obviously been crying.

"Edith, please tell me what's wrong."

"I was so worried," she said. "I thought everything was happening all over again. We heard about the accident, and then nothing. It's been over a week since it all happened. Why didn't you call?"

"I was trying to give your father a cooling off period. Letting things settle a bit. I'm sorry you where so worried. I didn't think that you would think I was involved in the accident."

He moved to put his arms around her but she didn't reciprocate.

"I can't go through that again. I just can't," she said.

"You're not going to loose me. You're being silly."

"I'm not being silly. People die. You said so yourself."

"Edith," he let out a sigh. "I don't know what to tell you to reassure you. Maybe I should have called, but you shouldn't jump to conclusions."

"How could I not? You don't know what it was like before. He was so alive and full of life one minute and then gone the next."

"You don't think I know what it is like?" Mark pushed her away from him. "Let me tell you something. I have ordered men to their deaths. Not one or two but hundreds. Do you think what I was doing in the Dardanelles was a game? This isn't your father's war of guts and glory and leading a charge against a bunch of under equipped locals. This war is about going up against a well-equipped enemy that neither side has a hope of winning. Stop grieving for one person and grieve for an empire that is killing a generation because of the poor leadership of a few at the top. Come and talk to me when you've dried your tears and are making some sense."

He turned and left Edith standing in the middle of the room, slamming the door on the way out. Edith stood stock still for a moment, before she threw herself face down on the bed and cried herself to sleep.

Mark wasn't at breakfast the next morning when Edith put in an appearance. He wasn't in his room either when she went to look for him. He had unpacked his parcels and the bed was made. Edith headed down to the officer's recreation area where she finally found him sitting playing cards with a group of other men. He looked up when he saw her but continued on with his game.

"Drat him," Edith thought. "He isn't going to make this easy for me." She took a breath and stuck on her best drawing room smile. The men were just finishing up their game when she approached.

"Mark, would you like to go riding with me? The rain has stopped. We could make an day of it."

"Yes, certainly," he said. "I'll just go up and change."

"That's fine. I'll meet you back here in say twenty minutes?"

He nodded his assent before he left to change. He hadn't made a move to kiss her cheek or touch her in anyway. Edith was doing her best to portray an outward calm while all the while her heart was doing flip flops of dread inside her chest. She went to order a take away lunch from the kitchen they could take on horseback and then went and changed into her riding cloths.

She met Mark back by the doors. She noticed how dashing he looked in his riding uniform. His shoulders were starting to fill back out and his limp was less pronounced that it had been just over a week ago. One of the maids approached with a satchel packed with their lunch. Mark took it from her and swung the strap over his shoulder before they left the house.

"How was London?" Edith inquired as they walked towards the stables.

"Fine. I don't want to talk about London, Edith. What is really bothering you? Have you changed your mind?"

"No!" Edith exclaimed. "I haven't changed my mind. I am worried that we will get married and in a few years you'll be feeling well and look at me and realize just how dull and boring I am."

"You're not dull and boring. You're anything but."

"You say that now, but what about later."

"No one can know what is coming. Can't you just relax and enjoy the moment?"

Edith was distracted as their mounts were brought out of the stables and lead to the mounting blocks. It had been raining heavily for the last four days and the horses were rambunctious from their lack of exercise. Edith mounted first. She hadn't replied to Mark until she was seated and ready to go.

"I could have relax perfectly well if you had the decency to call or write me while you were gone."

She walked her horse out of the yard and took off down the lane as soon as she cleared the cobblestones.

"Edith!" Mark yelled behind her.

Mark mounted as quickly as he could and took his mount out of the yard behind her. With the correct boots and apparel he found his seat easily and took off after her as fast as he dared on the muddy ground. When he rounded the third bend in the lane he spotted Edith's horse prancing in the grass on the side of the road. A large puddle covered a good twenty feet of the lane and Edith was nowhere to be seen. His heart rose into his mouth as he pulled his mount to a sudden stop that sent clods of mud flying everywhere.

He scanned the puddle for any sign of her, then moved his mount to check the long grass on either side of the road. He spotted her lying on her back in a tangle of dead weeds and long grass. He dismounted paying no attention to his own safety and went to her side.

"Edith, Good God. Are you all right? Wake up," he said patting her cheek. He could feel himself starting to panic. He had seen fallen men in battle and tended to injuries numerous times but this was totally different. If anything happened to her he didn't know how he could go on.

Mark quickly checked her over to see if anything was broken, then tried rousing her again.

"Wake up, Edith, talk to me. Tell me you're alright," he pleaded.

Edith groaned and slowly opened her eyes.

"I'm alright I think," she mumbled. "You need to teach me to ride astride. That side saddle is useless." She blinked her eyes a few times and put a hand to her head. Then closed her eyes again.

"The ground is spinning and I am lying on it," she mumbled.

"I'm so sorry I didn't write or call you," he said. "Can you forgive me? I'll never go without contacting you again. I don't want to loose you."

"You're not going to loose me, silly. I've fallen off a horse I'll be alright in a minute." She slowly pushed herself up to a sitting position then attempted to stand with Mark's help. He pulled her close against him until her world stopped spinning.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think or consider how you might feel. Please forgive me," he continued to plead.

"Just don't ever do it again," Edith said. She had slipped her arms around him and was holding him close.

"I won't. I promise you. You can come with me wherever I go. I don't think you're boring. I like how you think and how you are. You're everything to me. How could that be dull?"

"You're sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

"Very well then, I'll forgive you on one condition."

"What's that?"

"You teach me to ride astride."

"I think that can be arranged," he said before he kissed her deeply.

He released her slowly to make sure she could stand on her own before he went to catch their horses that were now busily munching grass beside the lane. Edith went to wait by her horse for him to help her mount.

"You're not riding side saddle," he said.

"Then how do you expect me to get back? It's a long way."

"On my horse."

"Mark!"

He grabbed the hem of her dress and ripped it up towards the waist so she could get her leg over the saddle.

"Don't argue." Once he had boosted her onto the horses back, Mark placed his left foot in the stirrup and swung up behind her just behind the saddle. His left arm circled Edith as he took the reigns.

"Consider this your first lesson," he said as they headed back towards the stable with her mount at the lead. They were almost back to the stable when one of the stable boys spotted the two of them covered in mud and started walking up the lane to retrieve Edith's horse.

"Still love me?" Mark whispered in her ear.

"Till we're old and grey," Edith replied.

"Till we're old and grey," he whispered into her ear.

_the end_


	21. Epilogue

Epilogue

Edith would always remember her wedding day November 3, 1917 as a day when the sky's over Yorkshire had decided to let loose a torrential downpour. A sure sign of good luck and a happy life together, she had been assured numerous times by the guests at the wedding.

They had decided to stay at Downton until after the Christmas holidays then moved to one of the houses on the estate to allow Edith to continue to work with the estate manager and complete her studies. Mark received a conditional release from the military in January. He no longer had to wear a uniform and would be fully discharged from his commission once he was back in New Zealand. He was kept busy arranging contracts for the sheep operation back home. When he made trips away from Downton Edith accompanied him.

In the spring of 1918 Edith received her Associate Degree. They decided to wait until late fall to make the trip to New Zealand. The war was winding down. Once it was over, the treat of torpedo attack would end. Mark couldn't stand the thought of taking a risk with Edith's life so they decided to wait. They had the time and money to make side trips away from the estate and took every opportunity to do so. They spent most of the summer attending live stock shows and looking at different breeds of sheep Mark was contemplating incorporating into the operation back home.

"Not too dull, for you?" he asked her one-day after they had spent all morning and most of the afternoon looking at sheep.

"Never," Edith replied with a smile.

Before they left England a very pregnant Sybil and her husband had come to Downton to attend Mary and Matthew Crawley's engagement party. Matthew had been shot in the leg in the spring of that year and had proposed to Mary during his convalescence. This time she had accepted without any reservations.

The day Edith and Mark stepped off the ship in Christchurch Mark had looked at Edith and said, "I'm glad we're finally here. Now you won't be seasick all the time."

"I think I have another few months of that," she said with a shy smile.

"Why? The train south is slow but it doesn't sway….. Oh," Mark said finally catching Edith's meaning. He grabbed her in an embrace and hugged her then set her down quickly.

"I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No, you didn't hurt me. Are you pleased?"

"Delighted and may I say, Lady Edith, welcome to my homeland. Let's go order that tractor."


End file.
